Two years of trying....

[oinker]

Today is the anniversary of my 1st m/c.
I am feeling quite low and just wanted to sound off.
I feel as though I have wasted two years of my life acheiving nothing. I have lost interest in everything apart form trying to conceive.
Two years is such a long time.
All my pregnacies have been filled with so much hope and I have nothing other than sadness to show for it.
I am dreading the next time I fall p/g. How could I ever get thru another failure.
I am sorry to rant and rave on about this. i really wnat everything to be back to as it was.
I feel as though I should be doing something today other than feeling sorry for myself but just don't have the will to do it.
It's a waiting game. And there are so many 'What ifs?'
{sad]

I am so sorry, oinker. Anniversary days can be so incredibly tough

Oh Oinker, so sorry you feel so bad, It took me two years to concieve ds with three m/c and now another after him, where everyone else around me has no trouble.
I guess all i can say, which youv'e probably done is get the blood tests, and rule things out. I have had them all, and two weeks ago was told by the specialist it was all just bad luck, very hard to believe, as I'm scared to go through another preg too.

At the moment i'm taking it easy and trying not to get to involved in the whole ttc.

Try and go on a holiday or get a new hobby the distraction may be just what you need to achieve your dream. You'll get there

Oh oinker, I'm soo sorry to hear this. I was thinking about you the other day actually (don't know that many women with septa...). How are things going with L Regan? Be kind to yourself today. Can you spend some time with your partner or a close friend?

Oinker

So so sorry you are finding it tough at the moment. I don't know what it's like to try for so long but I have just had a mc which was the hardest thing I have ever been through. Feel like the past six months have been all about ttc, I know it's not very long but like you I keep thinking, I should have been enjoying my life more.

On the + side, since my mc I have made some good changes to my life, I have cut hours in a job that I find stressful, me and DP have been playing badminton together, (i used to hate exercise and always felt so guilty about it) we are looking into buying bikes, and I have swapped my car as I hated it.

I guess I just kind of looked at all the things I was not happy with and tried to make them better, but I did them subconsciously and that way it seemed easy.

Now feel a bit more positive about things, but maybe you could pick a few things that you aint happy with and make a few changes-if possible. Good luck with ttc-IT WILL HAPPEN!!!! XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Oinker ((((((((hugs)))))))) it will happen i'm sure of it. Just wanted to let you know im thinking of you today xxxx

Message withdrawn

Thanks for the kind words and thoughts.

The day is nearly over now. It has not been the best of days. I have had a thobbing headache all day. I have had to kick out DH and the SKIDS as I have not been in the mood today.
I will be meeting some family later for a pizza and hopefully this will snap me out of this mood.

I was watching SKY this morning. (all new to me) We have only had it a week. I found the baby channels... [happy] so many mixed emotcions. Ireally have to snap out of this sadness. Irealise it is not doing me any good.
No more sadness after today.....I am just going to try and concentrate on me and my health.

It does scare me though as I am 38 and feel as though I am running out of time.

Hi oinker,

I hope you'll have a nice time this evening. I just checked some of you other posts. I hope you don't mind (I only come here intermittently so don't keep up with things). I saw that you'll have an operation soon. If you don't mind me asking, are they going to remove the septum, as well as the scar tissue? In any case, I'll keep my fingers crossed and really very much hope that things will work out for you. As someone already said: it will happen!!

OOOh Oinker, I feel for you, my anniversary passed as I lost triplets last August. I have managed to block it out, god knows how. I chose not to talk about it and keep it all in.

I hope it all works out for you in the end. x