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Original poster

Should I have ERPC or wait

16 replies

Stringkat · 05/04/2004 18:05

Just found out today that there is no longer a heart beat after a scan, should have been 9 weeks pregnant. Hospital has offered me a ERPC tomorrow or to wait, can any one offer any guidance, such an emotional wreck cant think straight?

OP posts:
zippy539 · 05/04/2004 18:33

Stringkat - I am so so sorry to hear your news. I can't offer any practical advice but I know someone else will. Once again, so sorry. Look after yourself.

bunny2 · 05/04/2004 19:27

Stringkat, I am so sorry. It is a terrible thing to go through. I have been in your shoes twice and both times I did opt for an ERPC the following day. To me, I couldnt bear the thought of carrying around a fetus who was no longer alive, I felt I needed to be rid of it before I could start to grieve and heal. I was also scared that I might start miscarrying at home and have to cope with seeing the baby. Those are my reasons for making my decision, it is not necessarily the right decision for everyone. The actual procedure was very simple and I was out of hospital within a few hours.

juniper68 · 05/04/2004 22:59

I'm so very sorry for you too Stringkat. I had the same thing happen to me 4 1/2 years ago. we went for the 12 week scan and no heartbeat. I opted for a D&C don't know if that's the same thing?
You're in my thoughts and prayers. Are you with a DH or DP? I just know my DH was even worse than me but no one asked him how he was. I did though of course, felt I was his rock when I should have grieved.
take good care and let us know how u get on hun xx

gingernut · 05/04/2004 23:12

Stringkat, very sorry to hear this. My personal feelings were much like bunny's - once I knew I was miscarrying I wanted to be able to draw a line under it and move on, so I opted for an ERPC. However, it all hapenned naturally before I could get the operation. By that time I knew there was just an empty sac so I no longer had the fear of passing a foetus (before I'd had the scan I found this a very distressing prospect). It was, however, quite painful to go through it naturally as I had regular contractions for about 12 hours (this doesn't happen to everybody though). One thing you may want to consider is that you may not miscarry naturally for some time. My pregnancy did not develop beyond about 6 weeks but I was unaware of this for 5 weeks until I started to bleed at 11 weeks. So if you go for the natural option you may be waiting some time. OTOH, I felt pleased in a sense that it all happenned naturally, because my body did what it should have done, IYSWIM.

I hope this helps you come to a decision. Take care.

Ghosty · 05/04/2004 23:13

StringKat ... so sorry to hear this ... hugs {{{}}}
I felt differently to juniper and bunny and I chose to go home and have it happen naturally. I didn't want to go to sleep pregnant and wake up not pregnant IYSWIM?
I had already started bleeding (was 12 weeks pg) when I had the scan so we knew that things were happening anyway ... maybe if there is no sign of anything happening you might want to opt for the ERPC ...
Although I do not regret 'it' happening naturally at home (I did not see the baby) I don't think I would choose that route a second time. It was quite traumatic. As it was, I needed a D&C anyway 2 weeks later as not all the 'products' had gone. So I had a double whammy really ...
Wishing you lots of love
Ghosty xxx

hana · 06/04/2004 00:06

so sorry stringcat, that you've lost your baby. My m/c both happened naturally and took a long time to get over, both physically and mentally ( if I ever have) I have also had a d&c which in my case drew a line under a devestating experience. Best of luck in whatever you decide, hopefully you'll get lots of support here and of course irl.
hugs
hana

Azure · 06/04/2004 10:54

Stringkat, so sorry to hear your news. My situation was different from yours, in that the m/c happened naturally, but it was a horrible experience. I chose not to have a D&C and it took over 2 months for all the bleeding etc. to stop. It was very distressing. If I had my time again I would have a D&C. I hope it all goes as well as can be expected whatever you decide.

melliek · 06/04/2004 19:14

HI Stringkat...very sorry to hear about this. It is never easy to deal with. I have had two in the past and think I am going through it again. Am four weeks preg but things dont feel right,,,so from my point of view I feel like get it all over with as soon as possible. It is something too hard to wake up to every day wondering when you will pass it. I know if this happens again for me I will want a d&c and then lets start testing ASA
P. In Canada they will not test until you have had three mc's. My thoughts are with you, Lord knows we all know how difficult it is to deal with , but time does heal all wounds.

Quackers · 06/04/2004 20:36

REally sorry to hear this. I have to agree about having an ERPC. My hospital insisted I went home and waited. I lost the baby at 15 weeks but baby was between 8 and 10 weeks. There was no bleeding but even so they still sent me home and refused to do anything for 3 weeks. I should have insisted there and then that I wanted the ERPC. Nothing happened, execpt I passed the sac so they did it 3 weeks later. I did get an infection from the op but this was quickly cleared up with anti biotics. It happened again 3 monthsa later but this time I spontaneously miscarried and had the heavy bleeding ususally associated with m/c, 2 days later it was over. Have a read of Lesley Regans book available on the St mary's hospital website under recurrent miscarraige. She syas in her clinic she onl lets people go home for it to happen naturally if things are already on their way. Hope all these posts have helped you in your decision and take care xx

bloss · 07/04/2004 08:49

Message withdrawn

hana · 08/04/2004 20:55

stringkat, how are you doing?
hana

Original poster
Stringkat · 12/04/2004 09:20

I just wanted to thank everyone for their support, the past week has been awful and just when I feel a little stronger another wave comes and knocks me down. Thanks to you all xx

OP posts:
bunny2 · 12/04/2004 18:59

Hugs Stringkat, it'll probably keep hitting you for quite a while. Hope you are ok.

FlyingSaucer · 04/07/2004 00:05

Can you tell me if a ERPC and a D & C are the same? I am ten weeks and went for a scan today after some bleeding at the weekend, and there was no heartbeat. A doctor and a consultant confirmed that the baby had died. They have sent me home to decide whether to allow it to happen naturally or a D&C, and I will have another scan on Friday. I really can't think straight I am so unhappy at the moment.

bunny2 · 04/07/2004 00:28

Ive been in your shoes twice FlyingSaucer, you really do have my sympathies. Yes a d&c is the same procedure as an ERPC, the only difference being an ERPC is specifically used after a missed miscarraige to remove or "evacuate the retained products of conception" whereas a d&c is a similar procedure performed for other reasons. I opted for an erpc on both occassions and was grateful to officially end the pregnancy in this way so I could start to grieve.

leander · 04/07/2004 00:32

{{hugs{}}}} I am so sorry to hear this,take care xxx

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