Help me to help him.. I'm clueless

[Firstpregnancy2014]

Basic background- I'm currently 21 and 26 weeks pregnant. 5 weeks ago my mum unexpectedly commuted suicide - she has never suffered mental illness depression Etc. This was especially tough as my grandma ( my dad's mum) passed away the day before.

My brother is 24 and has always been abit of a problem child with stealing etc. However last year he suffered from depression and threatened to take his own life. In the nicest way possible I saw this as a cry for help- which he got and he's been much better since. When my mum commuted suicide he felt awful and apologised to us saying he can't believe he nearly put us through this pain etc. And he's been fine since.
Tonight because his dole money hasn't gone in he's gone off on one, screaming at my poor dad, and text him saying he's going to kill himself and some other horrible stuff. I can't believe he's doing it. He knows how much we are all hurting. And if I'm honest I really just think it's for attention he's very immature. I find it hard to connect to him and he often shows his jealousy towards me as I 'always have money' in his words ( this is because I work stupidly long hours and I'm sensible) and I also own my own flat with my partner.

If it was down to me I'd put him in a category of an attention seeking idiot. But I know I'm cynical cause I'm his sister... How can I help him? I want him to understand how much my dad is hurting and how we need to be there for him. And how he needs to sort this stuff out but I have no idea how to suggest it without sounding patronising:(

Oh god what an awful situation and so much stress for you while your pregnant :( Have you told him how selfish he is being? giving you stress that isnt good for you or baby? might be cold hearted but thats my opinion, you have all lost someone so important in your life and he is playing silly buggers because he never got his JSA its pathetic he should be there for you and your dad so you can all support each other at this hard time. I guess people show grief in different ways and maybe this is his but its not on!

First - how are you? I've just seen your OP. I hope things are a little easier.

First of all, very sorry about your Mum - I hope that you and your family are getting all the support you need. Please make sure you get it. When your baby comes along (and congratulations by the way!), you may find yourself missing her even more - get some support in now to build up your strength.

How is your Dad? It's a double whammy for him - with his wife and now his son behaving in this way. Your dad is lucky to have you - you sound very clear headed and loving.

I hope your brother is getting help. The loss of your mum seems to have triggered some very difficult and challenging stuff. Is someone keeping an eye on him? Maybe a CPN or counsellor (referrals from a GP are usually fairly straightforward). If you're worried about your brother, you could post on the Mental Health forum on MN - loads of really supportive and practical advice. Have a look at it and take care.