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Original poster

Sad news from foundintranslation

108 replies

Ellbell · 05/09/2006 18:17

I've just had an email from foundintranslation, who's currently on holiday with very limited internet access. It looks as if she is miscarrying again, possibly a blighted ovum. She's waiting for confirmation of the diagnosis and will probably have a d&c. Meanwhile, though, she is physically well and is continuing with her holiday.

She asked me to post this on here, as she knows that there are lots of us on here thinking of her and sending her good wishese and she wanted you to know her news.

As ever, FIT sounds so brave, and says that, despite everything, she is 'full of hope'. Let's use this thread to send lots of love and positive thoughts in her direction.

We are all thinking of you, FIT...

OP posts:
MarsLady · 06/09/2006 10:31

Praying for you FIT.

Nanou1 · 06/09/2006 10:46

so to read this FIT. Let us know as soon as you know. [hugs] xx

CaptainDippy · 06/09/2006 11:01

Thoughts and Prayers are with you FinT - So very, very sorry honey. [honey]] xxxx

Saturn74 · 06/09/2006 11:06

So sorry to read this, FIT. My thoughts are with you.

staceym11 · 06/09/2006 11:44

sending prayers for you FIT.

WelshBoris · 06/09/2006 14:12

Im gutted for you FIT

ShowOfHands · 06/09/2006 14:14

My heart just sank when I saw this thread.

I really am so very sorry FIT. I wish you lots of love and strength.

There are a lot of people thinking about you at this sad time.

CarolinaMoon · 06/09/2006 14:34
Sad
MerlinsBeard · 06/09/2006 19:31

am sorry this is happening FIT, thinking of you xxxx

foundintranslation · 08/09/2006 17:06

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Pruni · 08/09/2006 17:09

Message withdrawn

foundintranslation · 09/09/2006 21:15

I'm back online. Crap journey home with delayed trains and mised connections, but I feel OK. Am bleeding very lightly and pain-free.

But bloody sad, underneath it all. I keep thinking why me, why twice in a row, etc. etc. But I know there's no point. Either I take the 'why me' seriously and get tests, or I pick myself up, brush myself down and get on. And I really don't believe there's something wrong. I think I've just had the kind of bad luck that whacks you in the stmach and slams you to the ground. The two mcs were very different. I think it was a blighted ovum this time. There was loads and loads of hormone and I actually didn't bleed at all, just a tiny drop on Monday night which made me go and get checked over. If I'd ignored that tiny drop I might still be none the wiser now. For whatever reason, my body seems to think that this is the wrong time for me to be pg.

I've decided to start saving small change in a special pot to buy something special for our second baby when it comes. I'll try and put something in every day. Sort of a concrete symbol of my hope.

Thank you everyone for all your thoughts. I'll probably be around on MN this evening, chatting and distracting myself. Don't think I'm being callous. It's just my way of getting on.

Greensleeves · 09/09/2006 21:24

It's so good to hear from you, FIT - after everything you've been through, you still sound so brave and strong. Your ds is a lucky boy to have such an amazing mother.

((((((((((huge hug)))))))))))))

Marina · 09/09/2006 21:27

FIT, first I have heard of your sad news I am so sorry you have had this rotten bad luck. M XXX

foundintranslation · 09/09/2006 21:27

Greeny

I'll email you back after a decent night's sleep!

foundintranslation · 09/09/2006 21:27

Thanks Marina and Pruni.

essbee · 09/09/2006 21:29

Message withdrawn

hoxtonchick · 09/09/2006 21:32

really sorry fit

foundintranslation · 10/09/2006 09:13

Thanks.
It's good to be home and I'm feeling physically normal, but the questions are starting to come. I somehow can't believe there's anything wrong - ds is only 15 1/2 months, and what should have happened in that time? And getting pg certainly doesn't seem to be a problem. But two mcs in two cycles, it's hard to believe in coincidence, although of course it's possible - it's not recurrent mc yet. I probably shouldn't be chasing after explanations - but the explanation that seems most likely to me atm is not that there's something wrong per se, but that something is/was wrong now, at this particular time. I know I've been hopelessly overloaded and maybe my body just decided a pregnancy on top would be too much. With my first mc I was pretty stressed too, and I remember the month I conceived ds was a very relaxed one, it was semester break, I didn't have much work to do and dh and I went out on walks and day trips and stuff. Whether that theory's true or not, I really must find a way to cut back on work and stress (but how?).
Sorry, rambling.

edie123 · 10/09/2006 09:24

FoundInTranslation

Im no doctor and what you're saying about stress could indeed be correct but I have heard doctors say that unfortunately mc happens when baby is unable to survive due to chromosomal probs or hormonal etc at that time, (probs with that preg, not your body). I doubt if it had anything to do external stuff, my friend is very stressy and gets herself worked up all the time, she even had a car crash at 10 weeks and her baby is alive and well, born last month. I dunno, as I said Im no doc and we all have to come up with our own theories but as you said, in today's world it would be difficult to eliminate any stress at all! Good luck xx

Uki · 10/09/2006 11:59

Hi foundintranslation

I rightly think you should have some questions. I'm very similar to you had 2 m/c then ds nearly 15 months and now another m/c. I demanded tests after two m/c and think others should also do the same, doctors won't help you unless you ask/expect/demand it and i think we all deserve to not have to go through m/c -there are very simple blood tests that can at least rule out the predominate cause of m/c- Hughs syndrome, thrombosis, factor V, arthritis, etc, etc.
I had tests done after 2 and found I was positive to lupus now after ds- have had elevated bloodpressure since pre eclaampsia and birth and now have tested positive to thrombosis (blood clotting) not helpful at all to achieving pregnancy.
Anyway your body can change especially after birth .Ask for some tests it can't hurt, i'm now on asprin and seeing a second specialist this week.
sorry i sound so adamant about all this but I don't really believe doctors really do enough take care

tribpot · 10/09/2006 12:12

FIT - and Uki - only just seen this thread. So sorry to hear about your bad luck, and hope the luck changes soon. xxx

foundintranslation · 10/09/2006 16:09

Uki, I'm sorry you've had to go through mcs too. Were you treated before/during your pregnancy with your ds?

Thing is, I'm in Germany so could probably get tests without a problem if I asked (health system works differently to the UK and is very specialist-oriented) but I just don't feel it's right for me yet. Of course if I mc again I will have to think about it, or if there is some kind of abnormality when they send back the histology findings from this D&C, but otherwise I think I don't want to be tested yet.

Uki · 10/09/2006 23:07

hI aGAIN fin
well my ds seemed like a bit of a miracle, as I didn't take anything for him, but developed pre eclampsia at about 37 weeks and was induced at 40 after lots of day stays in hospital etc.
I am in Australia and went to a fantastic large public hospial.
after suffering another m/c last month i wanted to get re tested as i have read alot about women suffering secondary m/c after birth and don't want to go through any more.
I think my m/c are later than yours though if i counted my one at 5 weeks that would be 4 m/c.

Anyway as I said blood tests made me feel better, as now i know it wasn't from the stress of moving house or my one coffee a day that have been causing them.
bye for now

foundintranslation · 11/09/2006 08:50

Hope somebody reads this.
Been pretty perky and brave so far, doing my usual thing of thinking to the future etc, but started feeling low last night. Found I was having trouble with it 'sinking in' and caught myself a couple of times thinking I was still pg so had to keep telling myself 'I'm not due in April, I lost the baby' and picturing the empty sac I had to see several times on ultrasound over the last week . Got up this morning and almost immediately lost it and sobbed for 15 minutes. Poor ds was terrified . Afterwards I gave him a long bf and it seemed to reassure him. Am still in a bit of a state. It is SO NOT FAIR. Why two more at all, why two directly bloody after each other? My poor little babies. Then there's the whole job and moving situation which is worrying me. I just want to fast forward the next few months and come out the other side pg, happy and settled back in Berlin with funding for dh and a job for me. Is it not time that I have it a bit easier for once?
I'm really, really down but I don't see the point in getting signed off this week - it's vacation until mid-Oct, thank goodness. I think hanging around brooding would be worse.