Recently Widowed, looking for similar female friends!

[LibbyXe]

Hi everyone, I tragically lost my husband at the end of January 2014. He wasn't ill, I found him one morning and he had passed away. It's now April 1st, ten weeks later and I am still reeling from it. I have older children and would love to hear from women in a similar position to me who are also trying to pick up the pieces and find their new "normal", it's the start of a new chapter for me and I would love to make some new friends who are going through or have been through the same as me. I hope to hear from you soon. I'm from the South Coast, UK.

[mirren3]

salt1, yes I do have children, 3 sons, they are much older than your wee one though at 26, 25 and 18.
I really feel for you, although I'm sure she will keep you busy.
Don't know about anyone else, but none of my friends have lost a husband although some are divorced/seperated and I sometimes think they don't understand how different it is.

[Scarletohello]

Hi all so sorry to hear of your losses at such a young age. If you have children who are struggling to come to terms with it, this charity, Winston's Wish may be able to help you.

www.winstonswish.org.uk/about-us/

[Leakingwellies]

Hi all not been on here for a while. Time marches on every day I feel that overwhelming grief that he's not coming back. Every night I dream about him, usually I lose him somewhere and panic, wake up sweating and shaking. My three keep me going. They are all struggling in their own way especially my youngest at 13 but the strength they show amazes me. We are in Spain at the moment as I thought it would do us good to get away. Absolutely dreaded it when the time came but we've had a wonderful time and have talked so much about their dad and their memories.

Hope you are all keeping well and have support xx

[Churstondeckle]

Hope you don't mind me popping in.my darling husband died last June.he was 55 fit and healthy-went to work and for some horrendous reason just walked across the work room and dropped dead-it wasasinstantaneous as that. Yesterday was the anniversary of his funeral-it was our nieces wedding and I sat with all his brothers and sisters-I tried to smilehut inside I was screaming- he should hVe been there with me-I kiss hi every single day and every morning when I wake up it is as raw as ever.i have 3 adult sons-the middle one is struggling so hard. We just loved and adored him so much-we had planned to grow old together-just seems do unfair.

[Agggghast]

Hello everyone, I am so sorry to hear of other people going through this awful experience. Three years on we are finally starting to live again. It is strange but for a long time my grief almost distanced me from my DH. I have just come back from taking the dog on one of our favourite walks and I felt so close to him. I will never forget him but he is now a very happy memory, just this weekend we were teasing DS about being just like his father and I suddenly realised it no longer hurt to remember his quirks. I don't know how to help you because the pain is ghastly but eventually as it recedes the love and happy memories return to comfort you.

[grobagsforever]

Hello all.

I lost DH a month ago to sudden cancer. I have a three year old and am 39 weeks pregnant. Still wading through the endless paperwork. Where is everyone based?

[Leakingwellies]

Hi gro.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I read your previous thread and although I didnt join in I was praying for you all. You must be reeling in shock and disbelief. Life is so very unfair. I hope that you have lots of support amd loved ones around you. Please try and rest when you can and keep your strength up for your self and baby

Its just over three months since my dh died in very similar circumstances to your dh and we are doing ok in that we get through the days. Im finding it difficult though at the moment as just been told there won't be an inquest after all and I so need answers. Im writing to the hospital asking for a full investigation. I feel it's my duty to find out what went wrong.

Im based in the north west. X

[needahug57]

Hello all
My lovely husband died less than two weeks ago whilst we were abroad on holiday. It was very sudden he just died in his sleep. I can't imagine life without him. The children are grown up and no longer at home, How I'll cope I can't imagine. He was 58 and recently retired. We were planning on lots of lovely holidays together. I feel so cheated and so sad. We were so happy and so very much in love after 35 years together.

[Leakingwellies]

Morning needahug.
What a terrible shock for you all. I am so sorry for your loss. That feeling of having your future snatched away is common to us all I imagine and so frightening. Im around if you want to talk. Xxx

[needahug57]

Thanks. I've just been reading everyone's stories. It's so very very hard isn't it? My husband was just so well and happy since taking early retirement. He was only brought home 3 days ago so we haven't had the funeral yet. I'm just so cross that i wasn't allowed to spend much time with him after he died, only a few minutes (around 5 I think) and we've been advised not to see him. For my children's sakes I feel this is best though as I want them to remember him as he was.
Nothing prepares you for this though does it? My husband's grandad lived to be 99....more than 40 years older. I just expected us to have another 20 to 30 years together. I know so many of you are much younger than me and I feel so sorry for you xx

[hollyisalovelyname]

I couldn't just read and run.
My sympathy to you all brave ladies.

[Beloved2]

Hi
I am sorry to hear of your loss.My husband died on boxing day,2013 - over 7 months ago.Though struggling with ill health for a while nothing prepares you for such a loss.I have gained support from my faith and church community.
The initial focus is to take care of your Mental Health.I took a few months off work to adjust to a certain extent to my sudden change in circumstances.This allowed me to gradually absorb my husbands sudden death and support my children.
I have since accessed Bereavement Counselling for myself and children.
However i have not been able to talk in dept about my emotions.I have had to look at my finances and realistically see what i can afford etc.

The key is to deal with one day at a time.Not looking too far along as it could create feelings of fear/lack of hope.You do get stronger each day and do ask people for support when you need it.
It is well with you!!!

[Edward10]

Hi
Am new this forum although I have used the Wayup site (for over 50's bereaved).

Really posting this for a friend- she is widowed with a small child and not very computer literate. How can she find others locally who are in the same boat? I know there are meet ups for widowed people but widowed with younger children is a bit different.

Anybody in East Anglia out there?

All strength to those on the lonely road of coping.
Edward

[salt1]

Sorry not to write for a while. I am in london for now if that is near anyone. Will soon be in birmingham area to be close to family. I have acceped an offer on our house. I need to move asap it is so hard to be here x

[jchocchip]

Hi. I started my own thread yesterday. It is 2 months since my lovely dh died suddenly and I am finding it hard. We had known each other 29 years, since I was 19 and married 25. Our children are nearly grown up. We had good times together, recently a holiday for our silver wedding anniversary, watching the T de F grand depart, socialising with friends, making plans for the future. I tried to go back to work but wasn't ready and my gp has signed me off. I want to sort out the paperwork and the house but I am finding it quite hard to get things done.

Well done for getting your house on the market salt, I hope that the sale goes through smoothly. I am in Yorkshire, but spend quite a lot of weekends near Birmingham with my mum.