Does it get easier?

[mrsmcfee]

Today I should be around 33 wks pregnant and planning my maternity leave. My little girl was stillborn a month ago. I felt like such a failure leaving hospital with a box of memories when I should have been taking home a baby. I didn't keep her safe or look after her properly.

I won't ever forget her, but does it get easier to cope with; the feelings of loss, guilt and failure that I have?

Thank you for reading.

Baby in a hurry, arrived early and left early, you did keep her safe and you did look after her properly, as you did what you could when you could.

It does change,

Do be really kind to yourself/selves.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

It does get easier, you will never forget but you will gradually find that it is not the crippling pain that you feel now.

Have you had a look at the Sands forum? I've found it immensely helpful to be able talk with & read the experiences of other bereaved parents.

Please carry on talking to us if it helps you.

My thoughts are with you & your family. Gentle hugs to you & your little girl

x

Thank you. Yesterday was tough as she would have been a month old. I'm finding those milestones more difficult, especially with doing bits at work.

I will look for the sands forum as I think it will help. As does just talking about her.

You will find links to the forum on the sands website sands. You have to ask for access which might take 48 hours but please don't be put off by this.

If it helps to keep talking then please feel free to tell me about her, I'm listening.
x

Do you have a baby loss group near you, we had to set up ours when the boys died,

Do keep talking about you child, the more you process the better, I went through lots of frustrations as DH went through the processing at entirely different stages than I, when we opened the loss group we were inundated with people men and women who had loss babies year previously and were in need of a place to process the situation.

I think you are being very sensible in being pro active in addressing your grief,

I/we am a bit on from you, and I wish I knew then how positive I would feel in the future.

Be very kind to yourself.