anyone know of a forum that would be of help to me?

[ShabbaWanks]

Hi I very recently lost my dad, not even had the funeral yet. he had been ill for a while but it was still a real shock. He was an alcoholic. Does anyone know of a forum or site that might be useful for me? the only one i have found is called sober recovery, its huge and seems more geared up for alcoholics/drug users themselves.
I am really struggling with a lot of conflicting emotions, the overriding one being that I should have done more/visited more.

I actually don't know how I am going to get through this. I always hoped he would get better and be the wonderful man he was when he wasn't 'in drink'. he will never get better now :(

I wish I could help. I too lost my dad and feel I could have done more. I had too arrange the whole funeral as my brothers didn't care less. This was six months ago and I'm still struggling..

thanks supermum, sorry you lost your dad, luckily my sisters and mum have been helping with the funeral (it was today) I just cant stop crying, we have to interr the ashes tomorrow so its like going through the funeral all over again.

Oh shabba. It's such a horrendous time and feel for you so much. Cry when you need too talk as much as you need too, go with how you feel. It really is such a hard time. Talk to him, he will be always with you. It's all part of what I went through, I lost my mum to a sudden stroke which killed her straightway, into a coma after a week she passed away im still in shock on and off and things run though my head. There was a something someone said on MN with grief some o round it, some try to climb over it, and some go through it. I go through it and ride the waves.

So very sorry your going through this, thinking of you, this forum has been great for me since losing my mum. X

hi thanks, so sorry you lost your mum suddenly. we have had the funeral and interrment now, and I am finding I feel ok, but whenever i try to do something like housework etc i feel totally overwhelmed. I feel overwhelmed by the future in general and at the thought of having to sort out his house and accounts etc. I struggle enough with my own life, as i have a couple of chronic heath problems and i dont know how i am going to manage all dads stuff as well.I feel bad for feeling like this

Take each day slowly, minute by minute hour by hour this is the only way I got through the first part, was very hard. Do what you can do when you have times of energy, get help too, is there anyone that can help you?? Do u know children who can help?? If you feel you need too cruise apparently are very good.

It was my youngests birthday party today and it was a killer!! Missed my mum so much but u know she's around us, and I'm sure having a sausage roll as she loved them!

Don't push yourself and don't rush to do everything, it can wait, take baby steps Hun. Take care thoughts are with you x

Sorry typo, meaning do u have children to help you? X

hi its me, shabba, thanks I have two young teen boys, they are helping round the house a bit more than usual, I am finding i get very stressed out, and the clutter in my house is really annoying me, where before i didn't really care. I have found myself stomping round saying ' i cant believe we live in this shit pit!' which is something I used to do in the past when I was very stressed out.

I am crying less now, which on some level feels bad, like i don't want to let go of the crying and the grief, as it feels like i no longer care, or something.

I am going to ask the housing association (his LL) if they offer any help with clearing properties of deceased, as I just can't do it all myself, especially as we don't have a car and his place is several miles away.