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Bereavement

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Lost my baby girl

22 replies

Ellypoo · 06/01/2012 11:17

I lost my baby daughter on New Year's Eve, she was just 2 days old.
She was born by EMCS on Thurs 29th because I'd experienced reduced movements, and she wasn't breathing when she was born.
They transferred her to a neo-natal unit for intensive care - I saw her for 5 minutes about 5 hours after she was born before they trasnferred her; then they moved me the day after to be closer to her, so I didn't really see her until she was 1 day old, and she was totally covered in wires and tubes and things.
She died the following day when they removed the ventilator - her condition hadn't improved at all despite all the intensive treatment. We had her christened at the hospital, and we were able to bathe her and dress her before she passed away in our arms.
I know we were very lucky to have that time with her, but it just still feels so unreal. We are starting to think about funeral arrangements, which is so hard - we should be trying to cope with sleepless nights and feeding.
Everyone is being lovely, I just don't know what to do.
I went to register her birth yesterday - I had been so looking forward to doing that!
Not expecting anything - just wanted to write it down. I just feel so empty.

OP posts:
ZacharyQuack · 06/01/2012 11:19

Oh Elly, I'm so so sorry.

celebmum · 06/01/2012 11:20

oh Ellypoo i'm terribly sorry and sad for your loss. Sad

xxx

MudAndGlitter · 06/01/2012 11:20

I'm so sorry for your loss. Someone will be here in a minute that knows what you are going through and can direct you to some threads that may help.
My thoughts are with you and your family xx

hairypotter · 06/01/2012 11:22

There are no words Elly, I am so sorry for your loss. What did you call her? xx

bakingaddict · 06/01/2012 11:25

I cannot begin to imagine what you are going through right now and dont want to give some empty platitudes

Get some proper help from bereavement specialists, they will help you through it.

It wont seem like it now but there will come a day when you will eventually manage your loss, although you will carry her in your heart forever. I'm crying for you now as i'm writing this and you will be in my thoughts today

banana87 · 06/01/2012 11:25

I'm so sorry for your loss Sad

leftmymistletoeatthedoor · 06/01/2012 11:29

Oh I'm so so sorry. It isn't right and it isn't fair. Life is too cruel sometimes.

Thinking of you all. What name did you give her? (If you don't mind saying)

AitchTwoOhOneTwo · 06/01/2012 11:30

Oh Elly, how devastating for you all. I'm so sorry for you and your little daughter.

homeaway · 06/01/2012 11:30

I am so sorry.

openyerlugholes · 06/01/2012 11:33

Words can't express how sorry and upset I feel for you Elly.

I'm just glad you were able to hold your little girl - that's something that can never be taken away from you.

cazzybabs · 06/01/2012 11:34

I am so sorry for your loss. In that short time on earth she knew how loved she was. What did you call her?

ajandjjmum · 06/01/2012 11:35

So so sorry.

Ellypoo · 06/01/2012 11:35

We called her Constance, which was shortened to Nancy - it suited her perfectly. She was just so beautiful - her body was perfect, it was just that her insides didn't work properly (because she was starved of oxygen, it caused a lot of damage to her organs, particularly her brain). Thankfully they don't need to do a post-mortem so she will remain perfect.

OP posts:
BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 06/01/2012 11:37

So sorry for your loss Elly.

Constance is a beautiful name, may she RIP xx

ben5 · 06/01/2012 11:39

thoughts are with you. Love the name Nancy

leftmymistletoeatthedoor · 06/01/2012 11:41

That's a beautiful name.

CailinDana · 06/01/2012 11:42

What a lovely name. So sorry you had so little time with your beautiful daughter :(

Mondaybaby · 06/01/2012 11:43

I am so very sorry to hear this. I can only begin to imagine the emotions you must be feeling. It is good that you held her and she knew the love you had for her in her short life. My thoughts are with you.

lisad123 · 06/01/2012 11:48

im so sorry to hear this. Its a beutiful name to match a beutiful little girl x

chipmonkey · 06/01/2012 12:13

Elly, I am so very sorry. I lost my daughter too. She was born at 28 weeks, did very well but then died after we had her home only four days. She was exactly 7 weeks old when she died. Please join us on this thread when you feel able. We have all lost children and know the hurt you are feeling.

MiaAlexandrasmummy · 06/01/2012 19:06

Elly, I am so sorry to hear about Nancy. It is so impossible, so unfair, so incomprehensible that this can happen. I have lost my little girl too, so I also understand the emptiness you are feeling.

madasa · 06/01/2012 20:32

I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through...so sorry

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