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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

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Original poster

if you knew this was going to be the last time...

11 replies

brokensleeper · 25/12/2011 01:11

iif i could go back to the last day...i wish i could just hold him,tell him i love him and sorry that i never said or showed it enough.how much of my world was him. we would sit on the empty beach,smoke a cigarette,drink beer and enjoy the peace together,like we once did.

OP posts:

shabbapinkfrog · 25/12/2011 01:15

If I could go back to the last day of 2 of my 4 sons lives I would hug them, kiss them and tell them just how proud I am of them. I would hold their hands and run like the wind through puddles - splashing each other till we were soaking.

I would make sure we sang 'pump up the jam' (my DS3's favourite song) so loudly that the 'noise police' came to our house.

xxx

chipmonkey · 25/12/2011 03:00

I would take her to the city centre and sit outside the hospital and pray that they could save her because it wouldn't have taken 40 minutes to get there.

LinusVanPelt · 25/12/2011 03:19

If I could go back, I wouldn't do anything differently, but I would appreciate it all so much more.

Chipmonkey, this Christmas must be so tough for you and your family. Your post is heartbreaking. Life can be so goddamned unfair.

Wishing you (and Shabba, and Broken) some measure of peace this Christmas.

everlong · 25/12/2011 08:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

McPhee · 25/12/2011 08:57

I would hold her hand and talk to her all day, we'd play 'shut the box', dominoes and bingo till she'd won at least one game. She was always a bad loser, but we still loved her. I'd take her to the beach for a cup of tea and bacon sandwich.

Miss you Nan xxxx

georgethecat · 25/12/2011 09:48

I would tell her I loved her so much and that she has been a rock in my life. I would be more patient, I would listen to her stories, I'd ask her more questions.

I miss you so much Gran xxx

JjandtheBean · 25/12/2011 22:25

I'd tell her how very proud I was of her, how she was the one person I knew loved me no matter what, how I can never ever be ok again without her. My grandma was my best friend and I miss her so much.

I didn't get a last day with my brother who was still born 18mnths ago, I still met him and held him, or my baby, at 13wks everyone assumes you'll be fine in a few days

karyncake · 27/12/2011 13:04

I would tell her how much I love her and how proud I was of her. I would apologise for every time I made her cry or wouldn't play with her when we were little.
I would beg her to run a mile when she meets him no matter what he promises her.

MiaAlexandrasmummy · 30/12/2011 16:52

I would have taken her to a different hospital.

I couldn't have given her any more love though. It had been a day surrounded by family, happiness and complete love.

MilkNoSugarPlease · 30/12/2011 21:54

I'd have gone to see him the week before...instead he died before I ever said good bye

I wouldn't have gone on holiday the week before and I would've bothered to get my fucking ass out of the house the day before...then I could have hugged her one last time

BCBG · 02/01/2012 20:43

I would have understood she was dying, that night, and I would have cuddled her and told her how much I loved her, instead of trying to get her to go to sleep, I would have let her be, and held her hand; I wouldn't have been afraid of the vomit, I would have said 'I love you' over and over again; I wouldn't have been afraid of how ill she was; I would have made sure I held her tight. Mummy I love and miss you forever.

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