Son's estranged dad died, what can I do?

[onegiantleap]

I don't often post on here but I'll just launch straight in.

My son hasn't seen his dad for 8 years and I heard through a friend that he had died in April. I have told ds recently but he doesn't seem to want to talk about it much. He is just 16.

I just wondered if anyone else here had been in a similar position? His Dad and I could not get on and contact eventually broke down. I'm really sad and don't have anyone to talk to, and I feel that I have let down my ds. I don't know how he died or if it was suicide or drug overdose or if they are the same thing.
Any support gratefully recieved.

I have been in that situation - i had mot since my dad for over 10 years when i was told he had died. I went to his funeral and it was a difficult time - i hated him for walking out but i was sad i never got the chance to meet him.

My advice would be to sit him down and tel him straight away - not sure you have told him yet? Then try and find out what happened - did he have other family? Parents that may provide a source of information?

Im still angry with him and its over 15 years later - I dont think i will ever stop being angry - he walked out and never had contact - especially now i have children i dont understand how anyone could walk away.

Does your son have a school counsellor? Or family friend? I dont recall speaking to anybody about it over than friends - that helped

but it was complicated by the fact that i also met a brother and sister and we were all going through similar