It's early days yet PC.
I could be well off the mark here, but is it possible your body's telling you something and you need to pause and take stock?
Allow yourself to let feelings come through because you'll feel better in the long term.
You're still in the middle of it. Give yourself time. I found the feelings of grief came and went. The first time was worse because it was in hospital and taken away from me. I felt confused and removed from it but very sad deep down inside.
My MIL was brilliant. 2-3 weeks after, I was still crying out of nowhere, and she took my DH and me to the river and brought along some pumpkin seeds which she'd grabbed on the way out. This sounds bizarre writing it now, but it really helped me. My nephew was there too. We each took turns at taking handfuls of pumpkin seeds, throwing them into the river, and saying a few words about the loss.
My eyes are stinging now remembering it. I had no sac to bury but this really, really helped. Somehow I let go. People said such lovely, unguarded things about me and my baby that never was, and though I cried a lot I felt so much better afterwards. I was able to make more sense of it.
It's rare to be with people in such and open state of conciousness, all thinking about the being who never came into being and saying 'goodbye'.