One of my work colleagues has committed suicide

[mummytowillow]

I have just been told one of my work colleagues has hung himself, no one would ever have believed he could do this, he is only 43.

He has young children, he was separated from his wife and was such a lovely lovely man.

I'm ranging between such sadness and complete anger towards him, how could he do that to his family? I know he probably had his reasons, but I can't believe it, his poor poor children.

I'm so sorry. It's a terrible thing to happen. I had a friend kill himself last year and felt the same emotions as you. I guess you have to accept that your colleague was ill. Some people have tangible reasons for wanting to end it all, others have mental issues which lead them down the same path. He may have been a lovely caring man, but illness made him think he was doing the best for all concerned - illogical I know, but when people are ill, they think illogically. Doesn't make it any less sad though.

Oh how sad :(

very sad and echo what daddoinghisbest said but ime you do feel a degree of anger as well for the people left behind.horrible at this time of year too.
you are probably in shock - it is a strange mix of emotions.

bump for you

One of my daughter's friends' mother killed herself last month. She was only 40 and had two daughters and a lovely husband. It was really out of the blue and has rocked our school community.

Helen was a beautiful woman who was loved by many. Her funeral was filled with all the people she touched. It was just unbearable.

The family were very brave and her sister spoke about mental illness and the need for people to be aware.

I am still finding it very difficult to understand why she would do such a thing and yes...am both angry and sad.

This website, although Australian, is very useful.

www.beyondblue.org.au/index.aspx?

His funeral is on Friday, I just know I'm going to be in bits

His son has put some lovely posts on his Facebook page, he's only 13 and I wonder if they have told him and his siblings their Dad took his own life, or if he just passed away?

It torments me to think he was this desperate and no one noticed, and I'm sorry but I'm angry with him, for leaving his children with out their Daddy?

I know exactly where you aare coming from and I am sorry for your pain and anger.

My FIL committed suicide 3 months before our wedding and 5 months after the birth of our DD1.

I was so angry for such a long time for what he had done to his children (ie my DH) and his grandchildren.

I even talked to a therpist about it and the one thing that stayed with me from that conversation was that when someone is so depressed that they are suicidal, the pain of living every day, of waking up every morning is so overwhelming, that the only thing they can think of is the release they will get in death. Their pain will be over.

It's so normal to feel angry, but imagining my FIL in unimaginable mental torture which meant he would rather be dead than be with us, with his DC, see his grandchildren, made some sense of the situation for me (as far as possible) and allowed me to let go of the anger.

I wish you all the best.