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Original poster

My father died this morning

27 replies

LaurieFairyonthetreeEatsCake · 16/12/2010 10:22

I'm sitting here somewhat hysterically waiting for dh to come home (if his school will let him)

I feel awful, I don't want to end up like him - I'm afraid

OP posts:
Poledra · 16/12/2010 10:23

Oh, Laurie, I'm so sorry (((hug)).

Why are you afraid, sweetheart?

Original poster
LaurieFairyonthetreeEatsCake · 16/12/2010 10:24

Sorry, I'm afraid i'll end up like him - irrational I know but I think im in shock

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 16/12/2010 10:24

Oh, Laurie. I'm so so sorry.

expatinscotland · 16/12/2010 10:24

Why are you afraid to end up like him? Did he have dementia?

kreecherlivesupstairs · 16/12/2010 10:26

I am sorry, I don't 'know' you but I have my fingers crossed that your DH is either at or on his way home now.
What did you mean you don't want to end up like him?

MaudOHara · 16/12/2010 10:26

Oh Laurie so sorry to hear this

Original poster
LaurieFairyonthetreeEatsCake · 16/12/2010 10:27

He was an alcoholic loser, in and out of jail - a blackmailer and a conman

Also he was gregarious, funny and deeply sad and tragic

a most enormous fuck up

OP posts:
Bucharest · 16/12/2010 10:30

So sorry Laurie. xx

kreecherlivesupstairs · 16/12/2010 10:30

I am sorry, try to remember him as the gregarious funny person rather than all the other stuff.

bumpybecky · 16/12/2010 10:34

so sorry for your loss :(

you probably are in shock, have you had a cup of sweet tea, anything with sugar would be a good idea

Original poster
LaurieFairyonthetreeEatsCake · 16/12/2010 10:38

I am in shock - there's a million thoughts running round my head

all the things my sister told me on the phone - he basically committed suicide, apologising over and over for his life - got hypothermia and pneumonia cos he wanted to die, refused to eat, refused to go in the ambulance - drank himself to death

and many others

dh is coming home, he just called

OP posts:
Hangingbellyofbabylon · 16/12/2010 10:38

aw, I know where you're coming from. My dad died 2 years ago and had many problems and ours certainly wasn't the best relationship. I went into a deep state of shock and collapse as I felt a lot of his way of life was inevitable and I couldn't prevent it. Things have got better but for today allow yourself to think and feel anything that comes your way. Be kind to yourself, I'm so sorry for the loss of your Dad. Even crap Dads are still dads and you're allowed to feel the way you do.

jollyoldstnickschick · 16/12/2010 10:41

Laurie Sad.

I know exactly what you are saying - my mum died when I was 11 she was everything I strive not to be,but she was my mum.

Lulumaam · 16/12/2010 10:42

SO very sorry laurie. what a shock. you won't end up like him, you have the self awareness not to. allow yourself to feel whatever feelings are running through you . xxxx

ClaireDeLoon · 16/12/2010 10:42

Laurie I'm very sorry.

LoveBeingADaddysGirl · 16/12/2010 10:44

My dad died 2.5 weeks ago. Its funny what goes through your head, and none of it is wrong so dont wrry about that. Big hugs til your dh gets home x x x

MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 16/12/2010 10:45

I'm really sorry Laurie Sad Is there anyone with you while you're waiting for DH to get home?

comewhinewithme · 16/12/2010 10:46

((((Hugs Laurie))) :(.

Sariska · 16/12/2010 10:49

Yes, you're in shock. Try not to worry about what you're feeling right now. Just feel it IYSWIM. What (and how) you feel now will not be what (and how) you feel in a few days, weeks, months or years.

Drink sweet tea. It really is good for that shocked shaky feeling.

Thinking of you - all the more because today is the anniversary of my Dad's sudden death.

Hope DH I with you soon.

LadyBuzz · 16/12/2010 10:52

So sorry for you Laurie.

PadmeHum · 16/12/2010 10:53

Take care Laurie and sorry for your loss.

Ormirian · 16/12/2010 11:02

Sorry to hear that Laurie Sad

thinking of you x

expatinscotland · 16/12/2010 13:34

Hope you're doing okay, Laurie.

sethstarofbethlehemsmum · 16/12/2010 13:35

so sorry. hope your dh is home soon to look after you.

Rindercella · 16/12/2010 13:38

Laurie, I am so sorry for the loss of your father. It must be such a huge shock for you.

Pleased DH is going to be with you.

xxx

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