What would you write in this card?

[SoLongAsItsHealthy]

Also posted in Relationships - wasn't sure where appropriate...

My aunt (father's sister) has just been diagnosed with terminal cancer. They are not offering her any treatment as the tumours are too advanced, just palliative care. So sad. My Dad is devastated and is off to see her at the weekend. We are not going with him as it would be too much of an intrusion I feel just yet, but I really want to do something. Is a card a trite thing to do? What does one say? Would/could anything make her feel better/worse? Or am I just looking to make myself feel better? Yes, probably... She was being cared for at home but has been taken into hospital today for more help. Just feel at a loss to know what to do.

If anyone has been in this sitiation, could you advise me as to what would be a good thing to write in a card? I can hardly say "get well soon" but equally don't want to be morbid and make her feel depressed.

Doing nothing seems wrong. Sending flowers seems corny. Visiting is out of the question just yet as she is not well enough and we live so far away. Plus, she does have a big family all around her so at least she is not alone.

Any advice? I've bought this card now spent forever choosing the right one but now, for once, I'm lost for words...

Thinking of you, would be appropriate. However I would suggest a newsy letter might be more useful, and maybe include a drawing from your kids?

You could add some photos, either of the kids or maybe a place of interest to her.

When mil was in hospital before she died, we took some photos of the kids on a walk with her dog. I know she appreciated those.

A home-made card that you've made especially for her would be nice, something personal. I wouldn't know what to write either.

'Thinking of you' sounds like a good suggestion.

I think a card would be lovely, just to acknowledge what she and her family are going through.

I think a good starting point for writing difficult cards is to first think about what sentiment you want to convey, without thinking about the actual words yet.

Once you know what you want to get across, the words may come easier. IMO the simpler the better, you don't need to write an essay. A couple of heartfelt lines goes a lot further than any amount of the usual stuff that everybody writes without thinking.

I had to write a similar card when I was younger and just couldn't put what I wanted to say into words so just wrote "I love you" My Auntie later said it was lovely and said it all without making light of the situation or being morbid.

Aww, that's lovely mummylion. That's what I was trying (not very well) to express.