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21 month old scratching other children. Need some wise words!

3 replies

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 07/07/2010 19:35

My DD is 21 months and has been going to nursery since she was 10 months old. She has recently moved into the toddler room and has come on in leaps and bounds. She is currently looking as though she's keen to come out of nappies and wants to go into her big girl bed. All good stuff so far.
However in the past couple of weeks she has developed a nasty streak in that she is in the incident book nearly every day for scratching the other children.

She scratched 2 children today and wouldn't go to DP when he picked her up, so she knew she had done wrong.
Nursery are now talking about having her key worker give her closer supervision, which DP has taken as a sign that they may ask her to leave!
I think it's her age and she will grow out of it, he is quite devastated and doesn't know how to handle it and so just gets very cross with her (eg "she's just got to learn not to do it!!!").
We had a phase of pinching us a month or so ago and I completely ignored it and it went away, however scratching another child means you can't ignore.

Any tips - should we be worried that she is continually doing it and any ideas as to how we help the nursery staff?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
RumourOfAHurricane · 07/07/2010 20:25

This reply has been deleted

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dilemmarightnow · 07/07/2010 20:43

Mrsarch.. I have just started a similar thread, so unfortunately I have no cure for you! My DD2(2yo) has recently started scratching and pinching, mostly its directed at her sister(4yo) (who gets great pleasure from aggravating her!) but does pinch/scratch me too. She is due to start nursery in sep and im worried about her behaving like this with other children! DD1 attends the same nursery so I know the staff really well already, and have mentioned DD2's behaviour to one of them, she was really nice about it and said that they are used to it! I still cant help but worry though, I mean she hurts me, so how would another child feel?!

OatcakeCravings · 08/07/2010 09:09

Hi there,

Sorry I can't really help other than to say that you aren't alone. My son is a hitter and a hair puller (mainly - also scratches and has been known to bite). Hes bad at the childminder so much so that we've been asked to leave! He is about to start nursery full time in August (he is 2) and I'm terrifed that if he misbehaves there then we'll be asked to leave as well and then I honestly don't know what I'm going to do!

I've been to the HV and a paed about my son and the only thing that they say is to be absolutely consistent in your parenting and by that they mean that both you and your hubbys reaction to the scratching and the nurserys reaction has to be the same.

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