8 month old refusing to nap..help!

[Gizboss]

Hi - I really hope someone can shed some light and give me some suggestions as am feeling like I can't see the wood for the trees! So my daughter has never been much of a routine baby - I have tried to put routines in place but she just doesn't want follow them so we have fallen into a very rough pattern that has involved her having about 2 hours sleep in the day. She does go to bed at the same time every night and gets up at roughly the same time in the morning. She also eats at the same times every day. Until recently she would have a 40 minute nap in the morning, usually about an hour after waking initially and then would stay awake the rest of the morning, eat lunch and then go down at some point between 1 and 3 for between 1 and 2 hours. However, she has started to have her morning nap later (still only 40 minutes) and then even though she looks tired will not go down in the afternoon . I have tried to put her down when she rubs eyes etc but she fights it until she seems to get a second wind -she has just started crawling and so sits her self up in her cot repeatedly and cries. This week I have ended up trying to put her in the cot off and on all afternoon until she eventually goes to sleep - usually after crying a bit or more often ends up staying awake until bedtime. She is then a nightmare to get down for bed even though we are doing the same bedtime routine that has got her into bed by 7pm since she was 10 weeks old. LAst night she was screaming for 90 mins before she finally fell asleep exhausted - and at that point she had been awake since 11am that morning. This afternoon she finally fell asleep at 4.40 and so I feel I should get her up at 5pm so that she isn't too awake for bed (I've always stuck to not letting her sleep after 5). Feel like I'm going crazy. It hasn't helped that she's been teething and waking in the night a lot too so I'm just feeling exhausted. Can anyone make sense of this or offer any suggestions for getting her to nap in the afternoon at a more reasonable time? I think that a lot of things are changing for her - she's so much more aware of the world but would have thought she would be more tired and need her sleep. Any thoughts welcome. Thanks

Hi, hope I am of some help.I think that around 9 month babies begin to cut back their morning nap, so maybe you could try stopping that. I'm guessing that she does need the afternoon sleep as she's rubbing eyes etc. MY little boy is 10 month old and he sleeps from 1 til 2.30/3 and never later than 3.15 even if he didn't nod off untill 2. You could try taking her for a walk after lunch untill she gets into the routine and then when your happy with that put her to bed in her cot giving her a clear message that it is nap time and not giving in ( i know this is hard) I did this with a 2 yr old that has lived with us since sept and he had had very bad sleep assosiations. they both nap after lunch and go to bed at 7. my son wakes up at 6 and the 2 year old at 7. My sisters daughter sleeps for 1 hourish whenever she feels like it and is grogy and difficult to settle before 9.30pm. i believe in routines and that way you both know what to expect. let me know if my advice works for you. good luck

Hi, thanks for that advice - it makes sense. So based on what you have said, I think I am going to try to keep her awake most of the morning - we have lots of possible activities in the morning to keep her occupied and then put her down after lunch and see what happens. I'll let you know. Any other suggestions also welcome though.

Just to let you know - it didn't really work today. She woke at 6.15 this morning, we went for a walk, then went swimming then home for lunch and nap - she eventually went to sleep at 4 for an hour! Going to try again tomorrow but really wondering what is going on with her.

do you think she could possibly be too tired to sleep, will she sleep on car journeys or in her buggy, if yes apparently this is due to being sleep deprived. and would give the same advice as above, get her used to sleeping after lunch by using any method that works. Is it such a big problem if she doesn't have a nap? maybe shes making such a fuss about it cause mum is and picking up on your anxiety about it. oh.. did she go to bed well this evening. Have no more suggestions as can only tell you what worked for me, other than possibly reading gina fords contented little baby book...this was all the help i needed. try amazon

No, she loves being in the pushchair and leans forward looking around and smiling at people, can't remember the last time she fell asleep in there. The car seat is slightly different, but if she does go off it usually takes a good 15 mins for her to do so, by which point we are usually at our destination! She is a very happy, cheerful baby so maybe I just need to chill out about it - suppose I had got used to her going down easily and I worry that she's not getting enough rest but maybe she just doesn't need as much as other babies. Will continue to try for the post lunch nap but not be so anxious about it perhaps we''re just in a phase. Thanks for your posts though as you're the only person to try to help!

Thank you tribunalgoer - that is really reassuring. So at least now I can rationalise that it's either a) a phase or b) just what some babies do. Today she was exhausted at 10am so I let her sleep until she woke which ended up being about an hour and then she had 20 mins this afternoon - she was exhausted by the end of the day though and no problems getting her down tonight so hopefully this will continue. It's interesting that there is so much literature saying that babies need to nap a certain amount of time in order to develop properly - it seems to be designed to make mums' worry!

Her sleep could be affected by the 8/9 month 'sleep regression' - many babies have a developmental spurt then and their brains are so busy working on it that they find it hard to sleep. It's a bit like watching an exciting film before bed and being unable to go to sleep as your mind is buzzing.

More info here, here and here.

Angeldog the articles are fascinating and exactly what is happening. Thank you so much - am going to forward to all my friends many of whom are going through something similar.

Glad they were useful. So many people have problems around this age, but not many people seem to know about the developmental spurt.