Can your 3 year old dress themselves?

[lonelyonly]

Hi,

My ds is 3 and still shows absolutely no interest in dressing or undresing himself.

I have tried to encourage him but he just doesn't seem to be strong enough or cordinated enough to actually do it and he just gives up and says 'you do it please mummy'. I have tried encouraging him further saying he can do it, mummy wants to see him do it like a big boy but he genuinely can't seem to do it!

He is very independant with everything else and his coordination seems same as all other 3 yr olds I see in his nursery class but he just seems to be all fingers and thumbs when it comes to dressing .

He is very vocal and stubborn as well so I wonder if he just can't do it because he thinks he can't do it iyswim?

He can't even just pull his trousers up or down when he goes to the toilet.

So what do I do and how can I encourage him to do it on his own?

Thanks

My DS1 could dress himself by the time he was 3 (iirc, the first time he did it was when he was 2.10ish)......however, he is 4 in a couple of weeks and I still have to get him dressed most days as he can't be bothered and I don't have time to wait for him

Occasionally he will do it - most days he does put his own underpants and shoes on (and socks if he is wearing them) but I end up doing the rest.

See ds seriously can not work out how to put socks on! I try to explain it to him but he gets so frustrated when he can't do something first time - he takes after me . He seems to lose interest and get annoyed with himself when he can't do it.

He is charming really, just lacks a bit of patience!

My DS1 is nearly 4 and can't do it....well I think he can deep down but he doesn't want to. And unless he practices he will always be too slow....so I think it's fairly normal for boys??

My DD1 could dress, undress and put her socks and shoes on at 2 so a bit of a chock to the system lol x

gecko is 3y 4m
she has been able to and stubbornly convinced that she has to dress herself since about 2 and a half

sometimes t shirts are back to front, sometimes she forgets knickers and someimtes shoes are on wrong feet
but hey ho

I think its boys too. My oldest still need to be told to dress themselves the oldest who's 7 would still happily let me do it!

DD is just 3 and tries but struggles to get t shirts off over her head and can't quite pull up trousers over her bottom (she'll probably be afflicted with a large one like mine )

Both my boys were like Trinity's Gecko.

DD has been that stubborn that she has been dressing herself since 2.5 ish. She's 3.1 and insists that we do not help. Buttons, laces, whatever. Just like gecko, sometimes forgets knickers and the odd back to front item but from choosing to dressing, it's all her work. I think a lot of it is personality tbh.

Ds is now 3y6m but has been able to dress himself from about 3y2m and able to do shoes since then too. He cant zip up his coat himself though.

However, what he is able to do and what he will do are 2 different things!

ds can but choses not to at home.
in nursery he does and does a remarkable job.

DD is 2.5 and insists on dressing herself.

Thus she went to daycare on Friday wearing the previous day's socks (the only purple ones we have), tracksuit pants with holes in the bum, Winnie the Pooh pyjama top, a sun hat (middle of winter here) and her nappy on backwards.

Dd3 is almost 3 and can't dress herself at all. That said, I've never asked her to, I've always just done it for her, so it's most certainly me that's making it a problem, not her ...

I definitely need to work on this over the next year because it's not very pleasant for the child if they can't dress/undress themselves for PE at school - dd1 grew to hate PE because of this

My ds1 couldn't dress himself at all at that age, partly because of a lack of co-ordination and partly due to his fine motor skills.

The way that worked for him was to do all but the very last stage of each item of clothing for him. So, if he needed to wear trousers you would do help him into them and pull them almost up to the top (say, to halfway up his pants). He then pulls them up for that last tiny bit.

Once he gets used to doing that (days or weeks for my ds1) then the next time you help him you leave them just a little bit lower for him to pull up. Eventually you can get to the point where you help him to step into them and he does the rest, until finally he can step into them by himself too.

You can do something similar for each item of clothing and build it up gradually.

Good luck.

I think it can be a boy thing. My DDs have dressed themselves since they were 2 (but I had to put them into very simple clothes - pull on trousers and simple top). They have insisted they dress themselves, but I think girls can be quite independent.

I was shocked a few months ago, when a 6 year old boy asked me to wipe his bum (his mother was not around). I wouldn't dream of wiping my three year old daughter's bum, let alone a six year old boy. Anyway, I was laughing about it with another friend, and she said she often has to do her son's bottom as well. I think boys can be a bit lazier and happier to let mums do things for them.

There's nothing like a sweeping generalisation

With my kids it's down to determination and independence!

DD is 3.1 and has problems with her motor skills but dresses herself completely - shoes sometimes on wrong feet, tops back to front but we can't help her at all!!

DS never even tried to dress himself before he started school and has no motor skill issues at all - he just never wanted to and would still rather I did it for him and he's 6!!

DS was 4 in April and has only very recently started dressing himself. Although he'd rather i do it for him.