Too shy...eee iiiii hush, hush, I don't know why...

[GigglyWrinkles]

My DS is 4.5 and has developed a new thing about being shy. Won't go up to anyone, won't go on the stage for his play, won't even go to his teacher at times. I know it may be a 'phase' but are there any hints and tips for helping them to develop some confidence. It can be painful to watch sometimes and he's missing out as a consequence.

Just bumping as my 2.10 year old does this too (plus I love your title!)

Confidence comes from trying new things and putting yourself in new situations, discovering nothing bad happens & getting lots of praise for the effort. Then you're likely to take a next step

Is your son shy to start with but then will go on the stage eventually? Or is he so shy that he won't entertain the idea? If it's the former then don't worry... that's normal once children become more self-conscious and he's just looking for reassurance. If it's the latter then you might start with him doing the play for an audience of you and some teddies first and working up from there. Lots of praise and encouragement for anything 'brave'

As for going up to people... a little reticence about strangers (or even people you know) is actually not a bad thing. Some children like to take in the situation fully before making their minds up. Don't forget that teachers (even nice ones) are daunting figures to children. However, they are trained in how to get all kinds of children to participate. He won't be missing out.

Good luck

Thanks folks! TheLemur, I'm showing my age with the title!!

DS is so shy he won't entertain the idea, so will start with your suggestion of the teddies. Hopefully it will pass as he gets older.

I've also read it may be a self esteem issue too. That's when I feel guilty as a busy work/life schedule makes me think I've neglected his emotional development: being too busy to let him do more for himself.

(

That wasn't meant to have a smiley face BTW it was meant to be or

Giggly, that is SO young to worry about that.
It is perfectly normal. Massive social and emotional development can take place in 6 months at this stage. Your description sounds like me ten years later.