Can your 4 year old entertain themselves?

[neverenoughMEtime]

Im wondering how many 4 year olds play by themselves because my DD can't seem to most of the time. Im feeling guilty every day because i have DD2 to care for plus housework and other jobs so can't sit and play with DD all afternoon which she would like me to do. I play with her at least twice every day after nursery. (more at weekends when she is not at nursery) She asks me all day can i play with her and i notice im getting stroppy about it my faviourite sentance is now "you are going to have to learn to play by yourself!" which annoys me so must annoy her too!

But then i think, my mum didn't entertain me all day and i cant remember expecting her to? Its like my DD expects it, she goes on about how unfair i am when i say im busy!

I feel guilty, like a rubbish mum...it doesn't help that im surrounded by all these whiter than white mums at nursery! tell me what your 4 year olds do!

My DS1 is exactly the same - he is not quite 4 yet (he will be in July) but unless I play with him, he starts being naughty and misbehaving (apart from very rare occasions when he will actually play with his trains/cars/brother nicely). The only time he doesn't want my attention is if he is watching telly or playing on the computer - which tends to mean I rely on these much more than I should to get stuff done

I also can't remember my mum playing with me and not demanding it

I think this is a phase, particularly with first children. DD1 was constant in her "mummy PLAY with me" demands at 4, to the extent that I wanted to run screaming in the opposite direction every time she said it. She's now 7, and rarely asks me to play, although she would still love it if I did.

DD2 OTOH is now 3, and has never asked me to play - I don't think she even thinks it's possible

When DD1 was in full grip of the phase, I would try to make sure I did sit down and play with her (and by that she meant full-on, imaginitive play, in her bedroom, just me and her) once a day - usually for a defined period such as saying "I'll make a cup of tea, and then we can play while I drink it, but when it's finished I'll have to get on".

Thanks, its really good to know other 4 year olds do this too. Ceebee DD starts acting up too if im not entertaining her.
Bramshott-did your DD complain when you said there was a time limit? DD does and i feel guilty. She starts school in sept so i feel i should be playing with her/doing what she wants until then..not always possible though is it!

Thanks for the cup of tea time limit idea, i usually just say half an hour at a time but obviously she has no idea how long half an hour is. Cup of tea much better idea.

I think she just used to complain TBH! But one of her favourite phrase was also "you haven't played with me today", so it was good if I could say "yes I have - we played when blah blah blah". The trouble is it's NEVER enough - however much you play, they still want more. We should be happy that they want us I guess! DD1 was much better by the time she turned 5 I think, and also more tired after school etc.

Good luck!

Yes, my 4 year old DD can entertain herself.

However she is the youngest of 3 quite close in age siblings.

I remember when DS1 was 4 and he was a lot more hard work.

True bramshott, its never enough is it. It will get easier when she starts school i think because i will have all day to devote to DD2 and housework, when DD1 gets home i will have time and WANT to play with her, she wont have been bugging me all day about it

So will just ride it out i think, as long as i do play with her at least twice a day, may up it to 3 times to ease my guilt

Im hoping DD2 will find it easier to entertain herself, she is definately more content and laid back than DD1 was at her age...