Admit it, other peoples children are, well, difficult to get along with some times aren't they...

[tightwad]

They are aren't they, admit it, you cant get on with every one and adore all children all the time now can you??

Or is it just me getting irritated and on my last very thin thread of nerve endings when a child is VERY vERY difficult.

i do try, i do, i try so hard but some times its just not possible and a girl just has to walk away inhaling deeply yes??????

I agree. Children are often really hard work and really irritating, but when it is your own you have more tolerance because you love them.

Depends on the child.

Some children are mostly lovely and some are mostly horrendous! I have close friends with awful children, and DD has lovely friends with very unininspiring parents, so there isn't necessarily a correlation either.

I have the opposite problem. I work with children and I have infinite patience for the foibles of other people's children. And then I get home all tired and grumpy and my own children press all my buttons and get the brunt of it .

But yes, DD1 does have one particular friend who challenges my ability to stay upbeat and welcoming!

I think the thread title refers to all children whether they are other people's or my own. The key word though is sometimes. I am always astonished when people make comments about only liking their own children.

I sometimes don't like spending time with ds (when he is being particularly irritating and refusing to stop bouncing on me etc.) and the same applies to other children.

I love ds and spend more time doing things for and with him and worrying about him than I do other children of course. I also take ds's side in disputes with other children internally, though extrnally I try to be fair. But I wouldn't say other children are hard to get along with and ds is easy. That wouldn't be always true.

I have a much close realtionship with de than with other children but paradoxically that can make it easier to get along with some other children than with ds

DD has friends that I really cannot warm to, and also children in her class I really like but DD doesn't play with...because we are different personalities.

Some children can be very very hard work. DD has a friend whose parents are lovely, but she is one of thise "I must have an argument" children. I have never come across a child who wants to wreck the atmosphere quite as much as she does.

A real "cut off your nose to spite your face" child.

Most children, including mine, can be difficult sometimes. But then, so can some adults.

Don't you find it much worse though when other people's children are much more charming and well behaved than your own?

Nothing worse for generating feelings of inadequacy. . .

There are lots of kids I can't warm too.

Oh yes. One of ds's friends can be an really obnoxious little brat. His mother and sister are very nice and ds likes him so I just THINK it, rather than saying it.

Agreed.

Had some very long standing frends to stay this weekend. They are very permissive with their DSs though and after 24 hours I just want them to go home.

other's kids and your kids can be difficult. Its the nature of being a child - some days they are delightful, some days devilish and some days quite a mixture of the two.

One of my children behaves horribly when one of my friends is around. She doesn't like my child and my child picks up on it. Same child behaves beautifully around my friends who like him.

Op I don't even think a child has to be very very difficult to be irritating. Its a personality thing. Things that irritate you in adults will irritate you in kids too. I can't bear whining little visitors or snivelly types (don't mean sensitive types but those who can't stand it when things go their way) - nothing difficult about it but its like nails on a blackboard. When my own kids whine I can be tough-mummyish but hard to find the right tone with other peoples hence I get wound up more than I do with my own.

What I have found though is that it can change over the years. The child that seemed a whiney brat at 5 can be a real charmer a few years later. And the child you always thought was lovely turns out to have his moments.

Have seen the same in adults: can think of several people whom I really did not take to at first, and who have later either changed or revealed different sides of their personality.

Cory - you're right. Some of the children I found hard to deal with a 3 and 4 are now hilarious 5 year olds. There's only one I really can't warm too and I deal with this by being absolutely lovely and over the top affectionate to him as if I don't make a serious effort I get narky and snippy and the 35 year age difference dictates that I have to be the adult!

I've been thinking along these lines today. We had a few friends of DD round for her birthday at the weekend and one of her friends was really being cheeky and making faces when we were trying to get nice photos etc. I found it quite difficult to find the right way to deal with it - if it had been DD behaving like that she would have been straight off to her room! but you can't do that with someone else's.

I often find other peoples children difficult and have to steel myself when they come round to play with dd. However she had one round on Sunday who was an absolute joy, a lot of parents might have found her to be naughty, which she was but she didn't sulk, whine, moan or be petulant about anything and more importantly she got over minor stuff immediately and didn't do the whole "XXX did hiiiiiit meeeeeeeeee" nonsense when dd might have grabbed her arm or something, she just grabbed back laughed and went back to playing as a result dd did too. They did manage to shut me out of the kitchen though both of them laughing hysterically, I was so grateful for the lack of whining i just found it funny.

Dd has another friend who is v aggressive to wards her and dd will try not to retaliate but usually does at some point understandably. I've stopped telling her off if she lashes out in retaliation now and this girls mum does NOTHING to prevent her aggressive outbursts. I had to step in on Saturday when this girl was poking dd hard with a stick as her Mum kept quiet. I never usually do this but felt forced into sticking up for dd!

I do prefer children who are sparky and with a little fire in their belly TBH, I find sulkers and maungy types hard to deal with. However once you meet their parents it's pretty obvious why they are like this , learnt behaviour and all that. Also often a result of children who've been too rigidly controlled from babyhood and never get any space/time out to be themselves as mummy or daddy are constantly there hovering and helicoptering.

One of my friends ds is highly irritating, I have tried and tried for years but tbh my ds can't bear him so it's rather tricky. He is sooo argumentative, moody and horrid. Sounds awful but he is. We met with the kids in half term and I just thought never again.

This makes me feel a bit depressed. See other post. Is that what other parents are thinking about my dd? But I know what you mean. I just put it down to liking the children who like and get on with dd more, which is natural isn't it? Can't say I adore dd on the occasions she is reponding unfavourably to ds

Most children I know I like but DP has a couple of 9 year old twin cousins (Uncle became a father on his 50's) that are really precious, I cannot stand that Personality trait in children. They are also incredibly rude.

Not 'precious', 'precocious'!

there's only one thing worse than precocious children and that's parents who tell you that their children are precocious - as if I hadn't noticed and as if it was a marvellous badge of honour. All right I may feel paranoid about people not liking dd but I also feel frustrated by other peoples. Not usually behaviour but the precocious thing hits my buttons. Very different from bright, able, articulate, any of those I really enjoy.