Pre verbal 2 yo(s) biting third triplet

[duchesse]

Not sure if this would be better in the multiples section, but will try here anyway. Our friends are struggling a little with getting on top of the biting among their triplets. It seems to be mostly two of the triplets but the other (identical) boy in particular biting the third one really quite hard- he's now covered in marks all over his back. They've tried all the techniques they can think of- separation, making a fuss of the bitten child, "naughty step", although they acknowledge that at just 2 and being slightly behind due to prematurity and still non-verbal the naughty step may be of limited use- they mostly use it to separate biter from bitee.

My friends are handling their situation amazingly well (they also have 4yo twins) but are finding this more than a little trying and I wondered if anybody had any advice for them.

Bumoing.

Also forgot to mention that both parents are HCP and have applied every technique they advise patients to use so far.

Bumpity-bump.

Absolutely no idea I'm afraid, but I couldn't read without bumping for you. Triplets and twins? Ber - lime - ee.

Only thing that springs to mind is that, with that many kids, could well be an attention seeking issue. Maybe the multiples board would have some ideas.

I put this thread up on the multiples board as well, Luke, but for some reason or other they seem too busy to help...

Triplets AND twins?! That deserves a BUMP!!

I'm sure they're using techniques which involve withdrawing attention from the biter, making a fuss of the bitten and making a big point of praising positive behaviour. If they are doing it I think the only thing to do is to continue. If they stick at it they child will eventually get the message. What a horrible situation to be in - I can see why they feel the need for a quick fix.

Honestly you should see the state of the poor little boy's back as well- he's covered in horrible bite marks that have drawn blood. His parents say he doesn't look much better than baby P at the moment.

Hmmm, if it's that horrific, and withdrawal of attention/ positive attention elsewhere/ taking away toys/ sending to his room etc doesn't work, then what will?

How long has it been going on for? Was there any particular trigger for the behaviour?

Is there ever a justification for using some version of 'bite back'? Not actually biting him, but maybe dabbing a bit of something unpleasant tasting on his mouth every time he bites (eg marmite, that anti nail biting stuff etc). Completely prepared to be shot down in flames here, and I'm not sure if I would do it myself, but if the situation is that bad and none of the usual techniques work, then I'm just trying to think of something that would.... It doesn't sound like just waiting for him to grow out of it is really an option (his poor brother, and poor parents who must have such a lot to deal with in any case).

Have you tried doing a search on here as well, maybe other suggestions have been made in the past that could be useful?

I'm not sure that at his age he would associate the biting with the unpleasant taste.

Watching him closely and pulling him away every time he opens his mouth with a firm "No!" would be most effective but I can't imagine there would be many opportunity for that.

I hope they have registered a concern with their GP just to make sure they are covered if concerns are raised.

Al1son, they've both GPs themselves so I imagine they've already kicked the problem around with their colleagues.

Have been giving this a bit of thought and wonder if perhaps a concentrated time when they are watched every moment over a whole weekend may be worth trying.

I mean literally devoting the whole weekend to watching the children and achieving nothing else. Roping in support from friends and relatives if necessary.

Watching may help identify a particular trigger if there is one and will mean that a very clear message comes across immediately, every single time the biting is attempted or occurs. A consistent reaction to every attempt which is given by whichever adult is around may just get the message across.

It could be hard to organise but I can't think of anything else which is likely to work.

could something be done to give the bitee more protection on his back? A thick jumper for example, or multiple layers?

not ideal, and obviously would need to tackle the issue urgently with the biter, but just to prevent the worst until the biter learns...