5 month old baby gets real 'rages' - am worried there is something wrong

[BlameItOnTheBogey]

Can anyone give me any reassurance please? DC2 is 5 months old. She's not a particularly easy going child which I could deal with but I'm genuinely starting to get concerned there might be something wrong. She has what I can only describe as fits of raging anger. The smallest thing can spark them off (being in the car seat or the pushchair for example). She will stiffen her back, got bright red and shriek until she is hoarse. She can go on like this for a really long time (until I stop whatever it is that she is annoyed about). But it is unsustainable for me to e.g. not take her out in the push chair or for me to carry her all day (bad back and toddler to deal with too).

The noise she makes is well beyond 'normal' crying that I have ever experienced with DC1 and is so bad that people stop me in the street to tell me that I need to sort her out (how?). It's getting so bad that I feel house bound because we can't get on buses/ trains because she will have a raging fit and I'm really starting to worry about the impact this is having on the whole family. Does anyone have any wise words please?

As it hasn't been mentioned. My wee boy wasvery much like you describe at 5 months. One thing that helped him was realising that he hates going to the toilet in his nappy. I realised this at about 6 months when it became obvious that he only ever pooed when I was changing his nappy. Even more so in the last month or so when he's been doing the same with wees. Now he's nearly one, he almost always wees and poos only on the potty, getting very upset if he has an accident. Infact usually if we're out and he needs the loo, he'll hold it in and get upset rather than go in his nappy. So much so that I've had to get him a travel potty. I get some funny looks I can tell you, but the slight embarassment and effort to toilet him is worth it for the change in him, he's a happy calm little boy when he doesn't have to go in his nappy. And now when I look back I can see alot if his early rages were probably nappy related, like when he wouldn't nap. And now I think bloody hell, ofcourse you couldn't sleep if you needed the loo!

This may not be appropriate to you ofcourse, but thought I'd mention it incase it struck any chords .

Wanted to come back to this and thank you all for taking time to post such hugely reassuring messages. It helps enormously to hear that others have gone through this and come out the other side with no obvious impact on the child.

Slings etc really aren't an option. My back problems have been caused by her insistence on being carried at all times and I'm now on a high dose of pain relief and have been prescribed courses of physio and osteopathy so I really can't do anything that would risk making it worse.

She's been marginally better over the last few days. They key seems to be really restricting the time that she is in the buggy or car seat and doing everything I can to try and help her get the rest she needs (hard because she fights it so hard during the day but then is much better for it if she does actually nap).

Thanks again.

Frekkles, that struck a cord with me re my friends baby. She only used to poo when her nappy was being changed. She couldn't sit in a nappy with wee in it and rarely if ever did a poo in it. She was however quite late (IMO) to potty train at 2.11.

I think Dr Sears needs to re-write his high needs baby book to include some of the weird and wonderful things that have been mentioned here.

I haven't read whole thread but just wanted to say my DD was just the same, she cried most of the time, i got the HV round once when she was 3 weeks old because she didn't believe me when i told her how bad my 3 week old's temper was! I will always remember her standing over my baby with a look of horror on her face! She had no advice for me I couldn't go anywhere without DD screaming. She hardly slept and didn't drink or eat much. Everyone elses baby at the baby groups were happy and content,i was always walking around with mine otherwise she would scream. It was very hard and i had PND, felt very alone. I knew there was nothing wrong with her because the second i picked her up she was absolutely fine. You can't do that all the time though can you. I had back probs too so couldn't use a sling.

DD is now 4 years old and i would describe her as "spirited" She is a lovely little girl obviously i love her to bits, but very hard work and never stops chatting She is a fussy eater and STILL often wakes in the night crying as she always has.
Im not sure if this has anything to do with the way she was as a baby im just sharing our experience. DD grew out of the screaming when she could get about. Unfortunately she never started crawling until the eve of her first birthday [tired emoticon] lol

I now have DD2 who by comparison is the perfect baby!! It is only now that we truely realise how much hard work DD1 was/is. I would be interested to know if all "spirited" children start off this way?

Anyway hope my little ramble helps OP!

I think it's important to emphasise that it's nothing to do with temper on the part of the baby though. Temper may be someone else's perception of very insistent and loud screeching, but interpreting very young babies' crying as anything other than noise (the only noise they can really make after all) is a mistake.

Do you really think so math? I had thought that too. But she throws herself on her front and full on stamps her feet and pounds her arms (in a great imitation of ds' terrible twos tantrums). It does make me wonder.

Neverenough; that really helps too. Thanks.

My DD was exactly like this as a baby (hated the car seat,pushchair etc, and generally just screamed a lot). She improved a lot when she started walking, which thankfully was early (ten months) and also when she went forward facing in the car. I gave up on the pushchair though and have always had her in a sling. Recently she has even been on the buggy board and my 3 year old in the buggy .
She is only 15 months now by the way, and although improved on the early days, she is still a nightmare high maintenance!

My DD (3 in August) was like this, without any apparent cause. My theory is that she was vexed by her physical limitations. She became easier, developed a completely sunny disposition in fact, once she could move herself around proficiently. The first nine months were a nightmare, though.

She is still incredibly hard work because she has so much energy, is so curious and adventurous, and never stops talking (she was an incessant babbler as a baby). She finds it impossible to sit still. She hates being restrained, and will react angrily if you try to keep her still. For the most part, though, she is happy and full of fun. Well, mischief.

My DD is like yours mochan They are never still and never stop talking do they!
I agree that my DD was also vexed by her physical limitations. She always wanted to do something she couldn't do. Still does complain and try to do things she's not beg enough/tall enough to do and then gets mad!

Math - DD did have crying sessions which were "normal" and then crying sessions which were totally temper, she went purple and scratched at her face, thrashing arms and legs and was sometimes sick. She would scream the house down and end up losing her voice. Had to undress her to cool her every time. It was very different to her normal crying!

big sorry typo, too early!

NeverenoughMEtime -- Maybe she was allergic to something in her clothes or detergent that had been used to wash them? A little neighbour of mine became much less prone to screaming fits (with scratching and flailing, head tossing, etc) when her mother switched to unscented and non-bio detergent. This particular mum also switched her body lotion and deodorant and stopped using perfume.

My friend did all that too. Pesky aren't they, these sensitive children

My son was 3 months old and exactly like this - turned out he had a strangulated hernia which was causing him great pain.

I am in NO way saying that is the problem with your child but merely saying that if the behaviour is that severe then you should seek professional advice.

Good luck.

I started this thread when at my wits end 6 months ago and got loads of brilliant advice. I just wanted to come back and update now in case it helps anyone else who finds themself in this situation.

We started to wean dd at 6 months old and she had an immediate and severe allergic reaction to cows milk. Tests later showed milder reactions to egg and peanuts. As you'll see from this thread, I'd pretty much dismissed people saying it could be allergies (passed on through my breastmilk) because it seemed to manifest itself e.g. when in cot/ car seat/ pushchair. But we immediately eliminated milk and dairy from my diet (was never a nut eater) and the change was dramatic. I can only assume the the allergens I was unwittingly exposing her to were causing her headaches, tummy ache etc and this was the cause of her distress.

These days she is a much, much happier child. I love her to pieces and am so glad we have got to the bottom of the problems. So, if anyone else is in this situation, I'd urge you to consider allergies and think about eliminating the most common suspects from your diet to see if it makes a difference.

Thanks again to those who took the time to reply.

So glad you got to the bottom of it, OP - and glad that your DD is so much better.

Thanks for updating. :)

Hi,

Haven't read all the thread except for OP and first few posts. My DS did this till he was about 6 months when I put him in a pram or pushchair. He would be ok for a but and then would basically throw a tantrum to be lifted out. Crying stopped moment he was picked up. He just didn't like being strapped into things. I too had people coming up to me saying "is that baby alright" etc as I clearly harrassed was trying to buy something and keep pram moving.

I read that you have a bad back, so not much help, but I took my sling/baby carrier with me everywhere, so the moment he started I would put him in that instead. He has grown out of it now and is quite happy really. I also exclusively breastfed and he fed almost contantly for the first 5 months. I think at time he was maybe hungry too.

Oops. Just read your recent post OP. Glad you got to the bottom of it. S x

oh blameit, i am SO glad that you have sorted it and that you're all happier

i was one of the first on here to mention possible allergies/intolerances as she sounded SO much like my second child!

I notice that I didn't reply to your question about whether he was now happy and healthy, which I am glad to say he is!
he is 3 now and outgrowing his intolerances which is a relief, although we're not sure if he'll ever be able to take pure cow's milk but he can have tiny amounts which does make life easier.

I'm having a very similar situation and my health visitor seems to think my ds is hungry. I bf so don't think I'm producing enough milk. I don't drink enough and certainly don't eat enough. I now take time out to eat, sip water all the time and let's see how it goes!! It might not get to the bottom of the problem but at least I'm a bit more with it!!

Billbryant, if you are not restricting feeds (either the number / length) and are feeding in response to your DS's cues, you almost certainly produce enough milk. The WHO say that if babies are bf 'frequently and on-demand', it is only a handful of medical conditions which would mean that a mother has an insufficient milk supply.

What you eat and drink has no effect on your supply of milk, unless you're so malnourished you're at the point of starvation.

Kellymom has some useful information.