My 5 year old needs more friends ...

[VickiJ1]

I have a little man who is five in a couple of weeks. Doing well at school in all areas apart from social interaction. He spends every luchtime playing by himself - it makes me SO sad .He has no siblings to help and while he seems happy in his own company, I really want him to make friends. Any ideas or help would be gratefully recieved ...

All you can do really is invite other children he seems to get on with around for play dates. Invite the mothers in for coffee too - it always helps if you can get to know the parents.

Is he really playing by himself or is that what he tells you? Have the school raised it as an issue?

What are the school doing to encourage interaction? What is he like in the rest of the class? Reception is so play based that he must be interacting with his peers most of the day.

Have you invited any children over to play after school? What about any clubs etc? Or going to the park with neighbours etc

Thank you. I think I need to find some extra activities outside of school also, maybe that will help?!

That is what he is saying, not the school. School have said nothing - but it hasn't helped that he's on his 5th Reception teacher this year so no-one really has monitered his development all the way through. He says he has two friends in his class, but when I drop him off he stands near them, but does't play with them.
I don't think it helps that he seems young for his age... he's 5 at the end of June and one of the youngest in his class - his two 'friends' were both 5 before Christmas.

Dd had one very close friend in reception but would not play with her either while I was there at drop off and pick up. If I lurked to spy, she engaged as soon as I had gone.

Ds has problems making friends and I have found things like football and Beavers great for helping him. Can you find out whether there are any activities the other boys do (or are planning to do) after school that you can get your ds along to. Reception might be a bit early for this, but there might be things that you can put your name down for for next year.

I have been through what you are going through and it can be heart beaking. Don't obsess about it too much and if your ds is not sad, don't let it make you feel sad. I can guarantee that things are not as bad as you are feeling that they are.

Perhaps you could go in and ask the school what their observations are - if they feel that he needs support they could maybe be more proactive in helping develop friendships.