Help! 6.5mo old: Uber-clingy-nap-fighting-unsettled-?sleep?-nightmare... teething?

[snugglejunkie]

Hope this is the right place to post this...

As above really. My lovely, previously happy & contented DS has never been the best sleeper, but it?s been getting worse & worse over period of ~4-5wks. Even more noticeably over the past 2wks. Now I don?t get more than a 50min stretch of sleep out of him, no kidding.

And only if he is in my arms or in some way touching me (co-sleeping, he throws his legs over my hip or holds onto my arm).

DH cannot settle him. My mum (currently visiting as she does every month) cannot settle him. He cries if I am out of the room for more than 3-4mins and even if I?m in the room, he constantly looks over at me and will only play on his playmat for about 10-15mins before getting grizzly.

He fights every suggestion of sleep: back arching, eye-rubbing, writhing, shouting-out, grabbing ? basically you can feel & see the tension radiating off him.

He is chronically overtired, he never seems rested after sleep. Even on the 2 recent occasions where I managed to soothe him through his sleep transitions to a 2 hour nap at lunchtime (made no diff to night ?sleep?)

Until weaning started he was ebf, now gets about 4oz of formula with lunch and another 5-6oz at last feed (then topped up with bf).

2 days ago I found one small sharp scratchy tooth edge at the bottom front, and I can see at least 4 eruption sacs at the top ? one or two look like they are almost breaching. Am using calpol/neurofen as much as I dare ? prob twice a day for both of them.

As you can imagine I?m crumbling under the sleeplessness and the fact that my little man is obv not happy.

Suggestions? Advice?

Is this normal? Is it mega teething? Separation Anxiety?? What???

Even a post from people going through/have been through the same. Please say it?ll get better...

Can you handle any kind of sleep training?

Pick up put down from the baby whisperer worked really well on my DD who was the same. Depends if sleep training is your thing or not though.

(pick up put down doesn't involve leaving them to cry on their own)

Oh, and the other thing we did were hours and hours of walking in the buggy as she would sleep in that as long as it moved. Exhausting but did make sure she didn't get overtired.

Could well be teething. Dd1 was a breeze looking back, with dd2 we have weeks of crap sleep and screaming for each tooth, sigh, and she's only got 3 so far. Like you, we use calpol/calprofen as much as we dare, but probably at least once a day over a period of weeks (and I feel so rubbish about that, but she's miserable otherwise). I think calprofen helps a little more than calpol.

If she's not mad keen on sleep anyway, then it won't take much to disturb her, so I agree that some kind of sleep training could help (although that probably doesn't fit with co sleeping? I don't know).

Also doesn't sound like a huge amount of milk, which is still v important at 6 months. If I remember I think the minimum should be about 650ml?

Oh yes, it could also be separation anxiety, that tends to start around now. But if he's miserable that's probably why he just wants his mum. Sit tight, this too shall pass and all that.

Because your DS has been suffering with his teeth and you (understandably) have been comforting him more and more over the weeks he has lost the ability to be able to settle himself back to sleep without you.
I had this with my DS and my advice is to wait until his teeth have settled down again and he is no longer in any discomfort and then try some sort of sleep training to teach him how to settle himself again.
There are several methods but I just stayed with my DS rubbing his back until he was starting to nod off and just before he did I would leave the room. He will more than likely object to this and scream for you to pick him up, but if you are firm and consistent then he will eventually get the message.
You just have to find a technique that works for you and your DS and then stick with it and then hopefully you will get some more sleep.
Good Luck and I hope it improves soon.

btw if he screams when you leave the room then you go back in and repeat the process, I am not recommending you leave him to scream.

He's teething. he feels like rubbish. he needs his mummy.

If he needs contact with you to get restful sleep, let him sleep on you and put your feet up in front of the tv or read a book. Even better, invest in a sling so you can be mobile while he sleeps. It WON'T last forever.

Thanks ever so for prompt responses.
withor.. we are up for some gentle sleep training, and have been trying pupd at bedtimes, but doesn't seem to be working - getting worse if anything.

Tbh it prob doesn't help that I'm so very tired that I'm generally in bed by 8.30/9pm. After which the path of least resistance often calls. Not that there actually is a path of least resistance at the moment...

Also i'm not keen on strict sleep training if he is genuinely distressed from teething - if teething does make tham that distressed?

lukewarm - he also bf's on demand through the day, forgot to mention. It's just the formula I've intro'd I put in the post. Not sure why tbh! I would also agree that neurofen seems to help more than paracetamol.

sleepdeprived I think you do have a point there. My instincts have been telling me that I should wait until his teeth have ssettled - any idea how long this will be??! I mean he's got at least 4 eruption sacs at the top - is this normal to have so many all aat once?

He has just had a 40-50min nap on me and is now playing on my mum's lap - but looking over at me a lot! Seems v early for sep anxiety is it not? Dreading him starting nursery at 10months!!

puffy - have a total of 3 slings!!! Little buggerface* fights all of them.

If teething is at the root (pardon the crappy pun) of this, then I am prepared to stick it out and give loads of cuddles. Just seems to be going on for a v long time.

*he is actually lovely really

Yes teething can cause that much pain. I would have scoffed at the idea before dd2 (being a smug mum of an easy baby, oh how that is now biting me in the bum!), but she actually passed out when her first tooth came through! It can last for weeks, on and off, and sometimes not result in anything, or loads of teeth can come through at once, all totally normal. I think if you're in any doubt that they are in pain or ill, then you just have to cuddle it out and worry about sleep training later. Which doesn't stop it being really blooming hard, you have my sympathy...

Ps don't worry about separation anxiety, it's totally normal and they get over it. If you just leave him with other people for short periods (when he's feeling himself again) then he'll gradually get used to you not being there. He'll have so much entertainment out of the other children at nursery he'll be fine.

Just a completely seperate thought - has the trouble started since you introduced formula? Could there be a dairy intolerance or a reaction to a food he eats going on?

Completely normal for so many to occur at once. A friend of mine her 2 DS's had all 20 teeth by the time they were 12 months old
You should be able to tell when his teeth have calmed down as the amount of dribbling/chewing random objects will reduce and if his nappies have gone all runny and horrible then these should return to normal too.
Have you tried Ashtons teething powders, I find these help my DS a lot, not to stop the teething pain but to settle his stomach after swallowing all of the dribble!

Sorry - didn't see the bit about it maybe being teething.

I totally would't sleep train if that's the problem. If sick/teething DD gets cuddled to sleep in her chair (for hours) then finally put back in her cot.

lukewarm - your poor dd! I had no idea teething could be this bad. Did occur to me about food/weaning. When this all first started happening (~3wks ago) I cut right back for 3days (just a pear to play/munch on at lunchtime) and no diff. He's only had bits of formula for 4days, and no diff noticed there either.

Tried the teething powders - ds just went for 2mins then normal service resumed . Clearly only likes the hard stuff. Have a fridge stuffed full of teethy toys & cucumber seems to help/distract him a bit.

Hope this passes soon as I'm keen to start gentle sleep training!

Ha, yes, dd2 quite happily takesthe teething powders (having the appetite of a 19stone rugby player, can't think where she gets that from), but then promptly starts screaming again. Useless rubbish!

Have you tried anbesol liquid for teething? It's really good.

Never heard of that, what's in it?

I don't really know but it really does numb their mouths (I've tried it!) It's the only thing that can get DD to eat when she's teething.

anbesol is like clove oil but less harsh

I favour the sling wraps they are brilliant and a good one as little as £20.00 for spoc, if ds needs comfort at least your hands are free and if they go totally off to sleep you can get them into bed without disturbing them.

This advice only helps to get through the teething comfortably for you both no if you want to establish independent sleeping.

Got some anbesol - tried it myself... bloody hell, I couldn't feel my face!! OK, slight exaggeration but it's powerful stuff. Had to laugh when I smeared it on DS's gums:
Seemed to head a major grizzle off at the pass though.

Anyway, as of today we have 3 teeth. Looks like more to follow. Still fought his naps today even though he generally seemed happpier. Layers of stuff going on probably, but deffo teething a major issue.

fantastic, so glad you've found something. teethings awful especially as it can make you feel so powerless to help sometimes. glad today has been a bit better for you

Wow, 3 teeth at once, OK, I think some grizzling is allowed for that!

I'm going to have get some of this anbesol stuff (to add to our overflowing drugs cabinet), sounds like it could be a lifesaver (almost literally). Thanks for that!

Argh - he has been pretty much screaming for just over an hour now - me & DH tag teaming it. Tried everything: anbesol, sips of cold water, calpol & neurofen (2hrs apart). Put a finger in his mouth and he chomps down very hard so it must be teeth causing meltdown tonight.
How many bloody teeth are coming through!!?!?