Please help , Im so worried about my DD , she is so anxious and down suddenly

[Debris]

She is 7. She has always been a sensitive little girl , but has gone from strength to strength in the last 2 years . But she suddenly seems to have struck down with the most terrible anxiety , and is tearful really frequently. I have spoken to her teachers and they are really trying to help her. This has been going on for a couple of weeks now , but no improvement. She stops worrying about one thing and immediately another worry takes its place. She has nervous tummy aches , and cant cope with everyday things like assemby. Weve given her a break this week with ballet class , and even swimming lessons at school as she was getting herself in such a state about it , it just didnt seem worth it. We have talked and talked and talked about what could be the problem , but to be honest I dont think she even knows. She is taking rescue remedy , has lavender oil on a tissue in her top pocket. I just dont know what else to do. I feel for her so much , its so painful for her , but she just seems to have lost every shred of confidence. Please help , in any way you can !

Is she being bullied do you think? Or is she sitting SATs? A lot of children get anxious about them?

I'm sorry for you and your little girl, hope it gets sorted.

Thank you justmooching , she definately isnt being bullied , and although she is doing her sats , the school havnt told them that they are doing them , they just call them quizzes and have been doing them over a couple of weeks.

Sorry I don't have any other ideas really, perhaps maybe get her to do some story writing and see if anything comes out of that? It sounds a bit far fetched but sometimes its a way of letting them say stuff that they don't really know how to say IYKWIM?

My son can get a bit like this at times. I try to give him something to look forward to like having a friend around after school or on the weekend, or some other treat.

I would also point out that just because the school haven't told them that they are doing sats doesn't mean the children don't know what is going on - other children's parents or older siblings will have called them sats and the children talk about these things, in my experience.

Debris, my ds is a bit like this and recently got MUCH worse, after having a tummy bug was convinced he was going to be sick anywhere/everywhere. The anxiety was actually making him feel sick.

I got him a fantastic book from amazon "herewww.amazon.co.uk/What-When-You-Worry-Much/dp/1591473144" which he really enjoyed reading and he related to in an amazing way.

Whilst it hasn't solved anything it has given him some coping strategies and also gives me something to relate to with him to help him snap out of these worry wort moments.

It is sooooo frustrating and I even find myself getting cross with him as I can't understand/control/help him out of it and the book really helped me too. HTH and good luck its so draining

thank you inmypants I am going to order that book. You're so right about it being draining , I was in bed before 9 o clock last night ! Every sentence she utters seems to start with " im not sure about " , "im a bit worried about". Ive talked , encouraged , boosted , suggested my way through another whole week and im wrecked ! Thank goodness its the weekend. Mind you there is a party on Saturday , so it wont be all plain sailing . Thanks again for your help.

I don't have any experience but feel for you and your little girl. I do think that though it doesn't feel like it, it is positive that she is able to express her anxiety - she is able to cry and to say 'I'm not sure' and so on. Children without a supporting family would internalise this.

My DS (5) is generally sensitive and anxious, and I recently bought the Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron (I think) which was very helpful in how he thinks/reacts. It sounds like you are being lovely and understanding TBH, but this may also help in generally understanding her view of life.
I'm sure you're already doing this, but lots of cuddles/hair stroking can also work wonders with my DS.

I got concerned about my ds and actually bought her some Guatamalan worry dolls - you tell them your worries, put them under your pillow and they look after the worries for you.
She then worried about who would look after their worries if they were busy looking after hers!

Its been suggested to me by someone to try a worry box which I've not tried with my dc because they can't write! But the basic idea is that they have a box and note book and they write in the note book and then put the note in the worry box. You can then read it if you want although you might find that just the act of her writing it down is enough to stop the anxiety and worries and you don't need to read it.

Thank you so much to everyone who has replied to my post. She seems slightly better this week. Mind you , I dont think she could have got a lot worse. I have taken on board all of your advice , ordered books etc. All really helpful.