RESPECT ME PLEASE!

[bubble1]

can anyone tell me how to get my kids to respect me...thats all i want. my 8 year old talks to me like i am something stuck to bottom of his shoe, and his 3 year old sister is starting to copy him. i would expect this behaviour in a trucculent teenager...he is only 8!! i try to treat them all fairly and give all 3 as much of my time as poss...but he just seems to hate me...help

Naughty step??

My DS 5 always the mild mannered one has started the answering back arguing the toss etc. I just walk away he can't argue with himself!!!

Surprisingly after a few days of him following getting louder shouting at me for not listening he seems to have got the message - speak to me nicely and you may just get what you want!!

'fraid thats all I got sorry.

dont really want to discipline them over this issue...just want them to want to be polite,listen,etc

First make sure that you are always-whatever the provocation-polite to them.
Start with 8 yr old(if you have a DP tackle it together)sit him down and tell him that you are NOT having it. You are his mother and he treats you with respect. If he doesn't, you will not do all the things that you generally do, cook the meals, sort out his school clothes, give lifts, have friends around. When he is rude to you, sit down with a book and totally ignore him. Say pleasantly that when he is polite you will continue. I have never had to go further than that-if he does then you have to carry it out. Remain polite yourself and ignore the tantrum.

Why can't you discipline him over this issue? Surely being rude and disrespectful is unacceptable. There's a kid in my daughters class who talks to her mum like this, and OK it's up to her if she wants to accept it - but this child talks to others like this as well. You have every right to sort this out - whatever it takes. And I expect he'll respect you more if you do get a bit tougher. (And I don't mean 'beat him' discipline - more along the lines of what pisces suggested).

I agree with julesrose about disipline just didn't have the balls to say it my self. Pisces IMO is right with her approach and as you can see from my above post I started the same and it did work in a few days.

thanx for the advice