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8 yo ds suddenly anxious

6 replies

Kammy · 06/05/2010 14:50

My ds has had a few episodes where he has become very tearful and what he describes as 'stressed'. Once was at a party (understandable - things can get very emotional) but he has now had a couple of episodes at the childminders. He becomes tearful, tells childminder he thinks I have forgotton to pick him up and also at cubs telling the leaders that he thought I might go to the wrong place.

Now I am probably the most reliable and punctual person in the world, and ds has never been picked up late from anything so I can only think that something is worrying him. We tried to have a chat about it - he said he doesn't know why he feels like this, funny thoughts just keep popping in to his mind. He also said that he doesn't see enough of me.

I work P/T and have done since he was 2. I have recently increaced days from 2 1/2 to 3 which means an extra afternoon at childminders. No other changes or upsets that I can think of.

He's quite a sensitive little chap anyway, but this is out of character in that he is also a boy who is good at 'getting on' with things.

I'm planning to have an afternoon in town with him after school, go for an ice cream and buy him a little toy (something pocket sized) that we can use as a reminder that I will always be there and won't forget him, ever. I'm also trying not to make too big a deal of it in front of him (though upsetting for me).

Has anyone got any wise words or other things I could try?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
kittycat68 · 06/05/2010 17:39

my autistic child is very anxious and i am not saying that your child is so dont get me wrong i just wanted to say that to help him i found that drawing a heart in his wrist with i love you on it worked a treat as he kept losing the pocket toys i bought and then got even more anxious. also i was also the most punctual person in the world and once got caught out and was late due to a traffic accident the child equally got highly anxious because i was late! i also found good was peices of fruit with srickers on that i had drawn funny faces on. giving him that extra treat you described also is good. sometimes due to commitments our children have to adjust and it can be a slow painfull time for them to adjust but they do and as parents we can only do our best to minimise any stress for them we can, chin up it will get better remember if he sense your stress he will pick up on it, best of luck.

Kammy · 06/05/2010 17:58

Thanks kittycat. I like the heart drawing idea, will try that.

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CogitoErgo · 07/05/2010 15:26

I'm just new here ... hello everyone. I've just been reading through posts to get a feel for them before I actually start posting myself. I came across your post kittycat and I have to say I think the idea of drawing a heart on your child's wrist with "I love you" on it is one of the nicest ideas I've ever heard. It's just lovely.

Kammy · 07/05/2010 17:45

Bump for any other experiences?

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pointydog · 07/05/2010 18:00

dd2 is prone to anxiety and when she was around the age of your son she was quite fixated with people picking her up on time, she didn't want to go into changing rooms or public toilets on her own (with her dad waiting outside), things like that.

We've found it;s just involved a lot of reassurance, not getting frustrated with her (hard for me), making sure we are punctual, getting her a watch and letting her wear it all the time ().

She is now 11.5 and has improved a lot with age but still has her moments where she doesn't really know what's wrong herself but she feels very sressed.

Don't know if that helps at all or not.

Kammy · 07/05/2010 18:09

Thanks.The little toy did have some effect tonight.

I'm hoping it is just a phase - and like you, trying not to make too much of it!

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