leaving babies to cry

[jesk]

Thank goodness the science has backed up maternal instinct (not that most of us needed it) and Penelope Leach has now proved that leaving babies to cry is damaging.

Can we now see an end to the horrible Contented Little Baby Books and the marketing force that is ruthless businesswoman Gina Ford once and for all?

Read it here
www.guardian.co.uk/society/2010/apr/21/leaving-baby-to-cry-brain-development-damage

Countdown to delete:

10....9.....8....

seems sensible, but is very difficult reading as a parent of a baby that cries more often than not (suspected undiagnosed food intolerances & reflux). Sometimes I just have to get things done and leave her to it

hobnob, I feel your pain. Ds1 had reflux and milk intolerance, until he was diagnosed and put on medication he always cried himself to sleep in my arms. There was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I still get stressed out thinking about it, and it's been over three years!

zapostrophe, I think you're right, some choices are simply choices, but there are other things that it can be useful to know are bad for/good for your baby. If you know that failing to comfort your baby when they cry can damage their brain and make them anxious in later life then it might make you react differently.

hobnobs - leaving them occasionally when you have to do something (I'm sure we've ALL done this!) is different from a policy of doing it all the time!

Beware what u say about gina.... She sees everything and does not take criticism too well!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so with zapostrophe.

For the record I used the Gina Ford book and NEVER let my baby cry it out.

You know I find all this talk about how damaging it is for babies to cry a bit upsetting. As a mother of a baby who cries a lot (been to see 4 different pediatricians, 5 lactation specialists and my GP - nothing wrong with him) then it's really tough to hear that he might be damaging himself by getting so upset. Personally, I think that if babies cry you should always comfort them, so I do, but it's very hard to be there in time EVERY time and sometimes all the cuddles in the world don't make any difference.

The only thing that stops me doing my head in over this is knowing that I cried ALL the time as a baby and didn't always get picked up. My mum was (and is still) deaf and simply couldn't hear me. I turned out okay!

I also find it a bit upsetting tbh. When my DD is tired she cries whether she is in the cot or being held.......nothing I can do will sooth her. I have however found that she will drop off more quickly if I leave her in the cot (I go back regularly so that she knows she hasn't been abandoned etc).

I guess IMO, if she cries in the cot and cries when held, then what difference does holding her make?

I am with zapostrophe.

Actually, I do wonder what the effects are of going to your baby every time he whimpers. DH and his bro were apparently continuously held and comforted as babies (his mother's admission) and they are both shocking sleepers (I know it is anecdotal but it is a theory in progress).

b