16mo forgotten how to sleep through - please help me!

[berri]

My 16mo DS hasn't slept through since November.

I'm going mad through getting up four or five times a night to him and really need some advice.

He'll go back to sleep if I sit on the chair next to his cot, but if I move before he's completely back to sleep then he goes mad screaming!

I've got huge bags under my eyes as I'm only really getting about 4hrs sleep a night....here's our typical night:

Bed at 7-7.30pm - goes off to sleep no problem with me just walking out the room as soon as I put him down.

Wakes at:
9.30pm
10pm
12am
3am
4am

Each time I go into his room, quickly rub his back for 2 secs then sit on the chair and wait for him to go back to sleep, which takes 15 mins or so.

I was following the Baby Whisperer pick up put down when necessary, which worked great in the early days, but he's not actually sitting up so I'm not sure what to do!

Please please let me have any advice you might have, I'm completely desperate

I have a similar problem with my 18 month old and he has been like this for a month or two. Previously he was a good sleeper. Naptime and bedtime I have to sit with him otherwise he won't drift off. He wakes up at least once everynight, sometimes 4 or 5 times, and each time either me or my partner has to sit with him or he won't drift off. It can take up to 30 mins for him to go to sleep, but usually its about 5 mins. With our ds its a seperation anxiety issue (and I suspect its the same for your ds too) and it should pass in time (hopefully)! However, I will be watching this thread for any advice because I would love a proper nights sleep again!

We had this - DD is now 18 mos. I can;t say that I have the answer, and it is just a phase that she grew out of, but we would leave her for a couple of minutes(assuming that it was grumbling wailing rather than an all out scream), just , then go in, make sure that she had her blankie, remind her she had it. Then when she was lying down and calm, kiss her, say goodnight and leave.

We had been diong as you do, waiting for her to go to sleep etc, but yes, it takes forever, we were shattered etc

If we ever thought she was in pain, I gave calpol straight off and if she was screaming, then would go in immediately, not leave her to grumble.

As I say, she has mostly, stopped doing it (proabbly nothing to do with the above!) When she does, we just go in, comfort and leave.

Anyway, sympathy.

My first thought would be to try the gradual retreat method......carry on sitting in the chair but over a period of a week or 2 gradually move the chair further towards the door, until you are out the door. Google it for more info.

That doesn't solve the issue of why he's waking in the first place though..........sorry not to be more help.

I think its not abnormal for babies/toddlers to wake up through the night but they are usually happy to settle themselves back down. The problem comes when they no longer want to do that! The gradual retreat method is a great suggestion and I'll certainly be giving that a try!

Thanks for your replies - I think I'll give the gradual retreat method a go, it actually occurred to me last night to try it, but I'm not sure if it'll work due to the layout of the room! But I think it's worth a go.

I'm glad to hear other people have been through the same and it has passed....not sure how much longer I can go on with this though!

He used to grizzle then settle himself but now it's full on screaming like he's scared or in pain, so I can't really leave him otherwise he gets in a real state.

Thanks for the advice, will try moving the chair when he wakes at about 9.30pm as usual!