CC on GMTV ... good or bad for baby?

[scaredveryscared]

This may have been done before... but I wondered do you agree or disagree with CC? What are your reasons and exp with/out it.

Thanks (mum to 18week old...who wakes in night and I am too scared to let him cry incase he wakes fully...he is waking around 7 times - not for feeding)

Your thoughts please..

I didn't do it. It goes against my instincts.

I am a hippy dippy co- sleeping attachment parent.

There are less harsh ways of dealing with night waking - have you read 'the no cry slep solution?'

Someone will be along soon to put the pro side across.

• sleep

We did controlled whingeing (it really wasn't crying) with dd when she was 9 mo. IMHO 18 weeks would be far too little. There will always be people who say it worked for them when their babies were tiny (whether their babies would agree it worked for them is another matter) but to be honest I didn't want my baby to get used to the idea that when she cried, no one would come to her. When they're older it's a bit different.

It goes against my insticts as well. I've only let ds1 cry when he was old enough to know why.

I think there is a difference between crying it out (CIO) and controlled crying, but people often seem to use the term CC to describe CIO. The guy that invented CC is, I think, the one that wrote Toddler Taming. He doesn't recommend it being used on babies below a year. Its worth reading that book, as well as the No Cry Sleep Solution, before making a decision about what feels right for you.

It went against my instincts but my now 2.3 yr old DS woke constantly when he was 8 months old. We tried EVERYTHING and I mean everything, all the "gentler" methods, like gradual retreat, PUPD etc etc. We persevered but nothing worked and we were at the end of our tether with sleep deprivation.

At our wits end, we tried CC. The first night he cried for 45 minutes, the 2nd for 30 minutes and the 3rd night he didn't wake at all. We were amazed by the results and I wouldn't hesitate to do it again with baby no.2 (due in August) when the time comes and nothing else works.

DS is a very happy little boy. He is not traumatised by this experience. It was 2 nights out of his little life and he doesn't love us any less nor does he think we won't go to him if he's upset. Of course he will never ever remember this but what I do know is that we were ALL happier from that point onwards for having more sleep. I personally believe I did him a favour - he was crying because he was tired and just wanted to go back to sleep but couldn't. It taught him to go back to sleep by himself.

It isn't easy and it doesn't feel right instinctively but if you want results and a happier family all round, it might be worth giving it some thought. I have a friend with a DD the same age as my DS who has woken up constantly since she was a baby and there seems to be no end to it. My friend won't do CC though (her prerogative) but I know it would work.

Lots of people will probably shoot me down and say it traumatises the baby but believe me, we have experienced no side effects at all and we have a confident, independent, happy little toddler who sleeps well at night.

I would just like to add that I wouldn't personally do CC before the baby was over 6 months old and fully weaned. You need to make sure they are not waking for hunger and it is just out of habit.

what about for naps?

Good points raised all round. I do have the no cry sleep solution and think it is an amazing book. I wouldn't try it with my DS as it does feel wrong but when it's your first baby I worry about everything I do!

My sister did it with her 9mo and it worked... she too is a happy 14 yr old...if there is such a thing!

I have put DS up for a nap... and he is grissling a bit but not crying.... is this ok to leave? I just want him to fall asleep on his own. He is fed, clean and a very smiley baby until it comes to napping.

exactly my baby is happy and when it is time for her nap we do a little 'wind down' time and then i put her down...and she cries...but she needs to nap do 1hr30-2hr active time she def needs sleep after that. I leave her to cry for 5mins then go to her, repeat this until she is asleep.

What do people fink?

It's probaly not for me, but I've never been desperate so I won't judge people who use it in desperation.

Pick up put down worked amazingly on my 6mo who has slept through solidly ever since (now 20mo).

We didn't actually do PUPD with the aim of getting her to sleep through - it's just that we used to rock her to sleep in her crib and when she outgrew it and went in to her cot we had absolutely no way of settling her.

I would use PUPD again if I had another baby who was impossible to settle, but probably not with the aim of getting them to sleep through.

Update.

Baby started crying - I went in put in dummy and shhh'd to sleep. He did his usual of waking at exactly 30 mins.... I tried to get him to go back to sleep.... boy did I try... in the end he ended up screaming and was inconsolable. I was crying he was crying and now I feel like the worst mother ever.

Does he just need 30 mins and that's it? Should I not try and get him to nap longer? This parenting lark is so hard.... wish I had a magic wand.

the books say naps should be between 1 - 2 hours for awake time of 1.5 - 2hrs.

should I just ban the books and go with his flow?

with my LO she definitely needs more than 30 mins and do think you can tell whether they are tired or not, when they wake up. reckon the crying maybe tiredness and not being able to self settle.(?) is he over tired when he goes down? the 2 hur thing is a must for me. otherwise she is past it and cat naps.
am sure lots of people will say go with the flow, but for me this was a nightmare and sorting the day sleeps was a must.

I thought CC = Charlotte Church and thought the OP was being a bit harsh

My DD only ever did 45 mins at a time, they're all different.

ScaredVS, my DTs only napped for 45 mins at a time up to 6mo - sometimes I could get them back to sleep with a BF but mostly not. When I started to wean them they napped a lot better, they started having 2hrs then - use the books as a guide but your baby won't always do what they say. Just put her down for another nap later on when she shows signs of tiredness again.

We used CC and PUPD at 6mths and it worked really well. I wouldn't leave them to cry for more than 20mins at this age though without going in to do PUPD. Maybe even 10mins - use your instincts. I think 18w is too young to do CC, however I think 10-20mins of leaving them to cry to see if they do drop off (often they do) is OK. If they are not asleep after 20mins then feed or cuddle or do whatever you do!

Thanks so much for your advice and telling me your own experiences.

He is tired when he wakes cos he is yawning within twenty mins of being up.

Will try the twenty min thing...

thanks again xxx

Have done cc with both of mine, dd is 11 months and has never cried when going in cot only in the last week. The cc works as long as they are tired enough and if that's the case they go off in less than 5 mins. I can't leave them doing it for long if they are v distressed but it was the only option with my ds at 12 months old. We always settled him as a baby on our bed and the older he got the more tough that was, he would get off the bed, cry, scream hysterically when we lay him back down, he was the boss, he eventually fell asleep when he was exhausted! My hv told me to put him in the cot and leave him, go back every 5 minutes, resettle him, then leave it 10 mins, go back in, resettle etc. It was a life saver. It took 3 nights of crying for 20 mins then he'd go in good as gold. I think your baby is too young, you could leave him for a couple of mins to see if he'd go off but that's about it. Good luck

b