Not coping well with second child aged 14 months

[BC33]

I am a bit stressed to say the least with my second child my son who is 14 months. My daughter who is almost 4 was a dream baby and a dream toddler she can be a bit fesity but on the whole is lovely and gives me and my dh no trouble. My son however is a total nightmare and has been ever since he entered the world!

He is not a good eater or sleeper and moans all day long, he wallked at 12 months and understands more than he can say, he just is so full on I feel I cant breathe and often end up shouting at him and losing my patience.

He is just a cheeky toddler he throws chucks and makes a mess of everything and bites me and his sister, he can be sweet but lately he just winds me up and I feel I can't cope with him, any ideas as I am not sure if its a boy thing or his character.

It doesn't help that dh works long hours and leaves the house before they are awake and returns whilst they are in bed I feel like I do it all on my own and feel like just walking out!

Any response would be great.

Hi I have 5 DC and my youngest is 17 months, he wears me out!!! He is into everything and still wobbley so have to follow him round and up/down constantly!! He only started sleeping through recently as he still has bad reflux, the first 6 months were horrendous as he was choking, screaming and sick all day long. He still eats only baby stage 2 foods. So what you describe is fairly normal in that it can be very hard work at this age. My other half works weird shifts and sometimes is away sometimes so I know that can be hard.

That said, he (DS) is amazing and fabulous and after 2 stillbirths we are just so grateful that he is here. They are alot of fun at this age with their discoveries and sweetness too! He makes me laugh alot.

I am not sure if it is as your DS is a boy as my DD2 was the same and at 10 is still abit boistrous! One of my other DSs was pretty easy/quiet so it is probably more a personality/normal toddler thing.

The good thing is that once they get a bit older things get easier and there is always playgroup etc for a break!!

Is there anyway you could get abit more of a break? Maybe a relative could take him out or something? Do you feel stressed overall or just with him?

Hi thanks for your reply.

I did have pnd after my dd and was on medication but didn't suffer from it after ds was born I am just quite stressed a lot and to be honest find him hard work!

I also know what it is like to lose a baby as I have suffered four miscarriages due to a chromosome problem, so feel quite guilty moaning about ds.

I think my problem is I am burnt out and it is the holidays at the moment as ususally he goes to several groups when dd is at Nursery

I do need a break but I lost my Mum almost 3 years ago and well help is a bit thin on the ground!

aw don't feel bad moaning! Think we all do at times! so sorry to hear you lost your mum, that must be really hard too. Holidays are hard. Anyway hope things get alot easier soon.

I could write this myself. DS1 was an a amazing baby, toddler ate eveything given , slept through from a very young aged. Seemed to understand no straight away and was no trouble at all , hence having another and along comes ds2!
Well honestly i think I have aged 10 yrs in the last 2 he cried when born and didn't stop for the 1st yr and then was grumpy till the last month or so now he just doesn't shut up!
He still doesn't sleep through every night he is 2.3 yrs and his diet can be so limited at times..
I feel awful and admit on many occassions I had regretted having another.. there is light and I think I can just see a glimpse of it.. I wish I had magic words to say but I wanted to post to say u are not alone xx