How long is too long to leave a 16 week old crying?

[fairywing]

DD is almost 16 weeks and i have been invite on a night out on Saturday. DD is EBF but has the odd expressed bottle although she makes a bit of a fuss about it. We have had a couple of practice runs for the weekend and while DD is very happy for DH to put her down if i've fed he she gets very distressed about having a bottle in an evening and will only be comforted by me. She doesn't take very much milk only a couple of oz's after a battle with it and will scream and scream. She does eventually tire herself out and fall asleep but she is just sooo unhappy and cries to the point where she is sick. So my question is how long should i let this go on for? Do i just go out and let them get on with it (my instincts say no but i'm not sure if i'm being a bit PFB about this) or shall i say no to saturday and spend more time getting her used to this. To be honest i think i will be that worried about her being so upset i won't enjoy myself anyway.

To be honest your post reads like you've already answered your own question.......you would be worried and not enjoy yourself. Is the night out a regular thing or a special occasion? If you will get the chance again in a few weeks time I would give it a miss this time and perservere with the bottle. Or could you get DD fed and in bed before you go out?

I'm sure there would be another opportunity, it's just a girlie night out and i was invited along with one of the neighbours. Unfortunately it's half an hour away and starts over an hour before DD's bedtime so can't put her down before i go. If i could then i don't think i'd worry about going at all...Well apart from the expected leaving the baby for the evening for the first time worries!!

I think to be honest I would leave it.

I wouldn't like to leave her to cry like that really. I think if it was for something more important I would say you could think again, however for just a night with the neighbours, nah.

give it a miss.. like othrs have said it's one night out . Fine is she's happy to have bottle from her dad etc but if not, I personally wouldn't just leave her not fair on your partner either..
this stage will end and you'll be able to go out and actually enjoy yourself soon!

Thank-you i think i just needed some reassurance i wasn't overreacting about this. I will cancel and hopefully be able to go next time. Now i just have to be brave and go and tell the neighbour i'm not coming!

Well hopefulluy the neghbour should be understanding - you have a 4 month old baby after all.

If she does make you feel bad she can't be much of a mate, tbh.

I agree with the previous posters - I think you'd do nothing but worry if you went - but would query whether DH has ever successfully given her a bottle while you're not around? My dd used to refuse a bottle of EBM point-blank if I was in the house, but was fine with it if I was out!

I would also give it a miss. Plenty of time for going out. She's only 16weeks-only mummy will really do!

Be prepared for the people inviting you to maybe be a bit "oh PFB" on you, which is of course absolute bollocks-it's your baby-of course she's precious!

Do you have any good friends who would do a 'girls night in' with you where you could be on hand when needed but still get the benefit of a meal (take away) and chat with friends?