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Behaviour/development

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Original poster

Mummy, why don't you have a willy?

48 replies

Greengage · 21/07/2005 21:24

My DD of 2yrs 8 months has started noticing the differences between herself and her brother (2 months). There are many different words for the male genitalia, e.g. willy, but I've been struggling to think of words for the female genitalia which are not crude or overly medical.

So if I tell her that her brother has a bottom and a penis, what would be the equivalent for her?

OP posts:

QueenEagle · 21/07/2005 22:40

LM - I totally agree with you. There's no point in giving information that the child is not ready for. They are ready when they ask and even then only titbits of info need to be given unless they want you to expand on what you've said.

I called my dd's a "gina" (rhymes with china) which was half way there when she was little and now call it by its proper name of vagina. Although now with her being almost 14, she tells me all the slang terms for it!

MarsLady · 21/07/2005 22:40

cos I have a REAL brain darling!

Lonelymum · 21/07/2005 22:41

QE, that is great that your 14 yo talks to you about anything at all let alone her vagina! I am impressed!

Tommy · 21/07/2005 23:18

My DS says "you haven't got a willy have you Mummy - your wee comes out of a hole..."
I think that will do for now.
Don't have any DDs so don't know what term I would use - we have discussed it extensively with our Mums and babies group - "Little Mary" ebing the one that made me laugh the most. I refer to mine as "fanny" but, as some have said, it does sound a bit rude. I definitely do not like c---

pabla · 23/07/2005 10:08

In a family I know they call penises "winkies" and girls bits "tinkies"

kid · 23/07/2005 10:15

Don't know if DS (3.3) has been reading this thread but he woke up this morning and asked me if I had a willy?!
I haven't spoke about this thread to anyone so no idea why he suddenly came out with that this morning! strange!

Enid · 23/07/2005 10:21

we have minnies and willies but I actually am beginning to hate minnie

my dsis says fanjo which always makes me laugh

ks · 23/07/2005 11:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Ladymuck · 23/07/2005 13:33

Having only sons, this hasn't really been that much of an issue - mummy has boobs, no willy, everyone else has a willy and no boobs.

But I would be slightly startled to overhear young girls refering to their vagina - I always see it as a fairly specific term? And would be surprised that a 4yo girl would even need to know she had one, let alone what is was all about.

Just a thought.

Elf1981 · 23/07/2005 13:37

I'm surprised nobody has used "tuppence" or "flower" which were two very comment names for it that kids used when I was growing up!

I think that tuppence is still used (my 7 year old Goddaughter uses that name) where I live in Notts. Non offensive I think.

hovely · 25/07/2005 20:11

recently at an art group I overheard the following:
Child A: "Mum, my minnie is itchy"
Mother of child B: "come here, Minnie, it's time to wash your hands".
much embarrassment all round.

my parents taught me and my sister to say 'vulva'. and I did read on a thread (here on MN I think) that vulva is in fact the correct technical name for all the genital area that you can see - the outside of the labia and the mons (is that what it's called?). I guess it's not a widely known word, but I also agree that generally the context will explain it.

nooka · 25/07/2005 21:01

My dd refers to the whole area as her bottom or bum. I will tend to say "make sure you wash your bottom, back and front". She sometimes says her bottom hurts (I think she has a bit of a cystitis problem) and I ask where, and she says - well actually she just says "here" and points...

I've never found the need to say any more to be honest (I have ds6 and dd4), although we have had a few conversations about hairiness (which horrifies them both!).

I think that on reflection I'd go for vulva, but I have never had a word myself - my dh refers to my "flappy bits" which I must say I'm not keen on!

tiredemma · 25/07/2005 21:17

in our house, (me v's 3 males) mine is called a "peach". Theirs has the name "winkie".

gingerbear · 25/07/2005 21:20

It is a Noonie - 'mummy and I have Noonies, daddy and Maxie (dog) have wiggles........' here quoteth my DD aged 3 and one month.

starlover · 25/07/2005 21:22

i was reading about this in Junior magazine yesterday

the correct term is in fact vulva. vagina is the hole... vulva is the entire external genitalia!

when i was little we called it a fanny

MummyJules · 25/07/2005 21:39

Greengage I too have had a similiar problem... Really don't like using most of the words that have been sugested to me so I decided to use " wee wee hole" which I know sounds ridiculous! Thankfully a close friend who has a daughter the same age has come up with a suggestion - her mini. I think thats fine and I am going to use that unless I find a better name for it here...

starlover · 25/07/2005 21:41

i HATE mini

my friend used to drive a mini. one day she turned up at a friends house and her friend said to her little girl "ooh, have you seen melly's red mini"
to which came the reply
"oh no.. is it sore?"

it's a ridiculous name!

MummyJules · 25/07/2005 21:43

True - After reading back through the messages I can see that it would cause some problems. Any other suggestions?!

starlover · 25/07/2005 21:44

i would definitely use vulva if i had a little girl.

Ags · 25/07/2005 22:00

Love this thread.

My Grandfather used to call a penis a booman and a vagina, a mary. His courting advice to us when we were teenagers was not to let any boomen near our marys. Sound advice indeed!!! (Note. Grandfather not at all pervy just come from a very open family!)

When I was little I just knew that whole area as my bum. So at a very young age, when I asked my Mum if her appendix scar was where she gave birth to me and she said "No, you came out of my bum", I was horrified and shocked and totally disgusted.

So imo it is a good idea to differentiate. Have a friend who calls it a fanny frou frou!!! REally makes me laugh. She just has boys though but what kind of messgae is she giving them?

hellomama · 25/07/2005 22:37

I always refer to it as my 'lady bits'. DOn't know what we call it when DS gets older or if we ever have a DD! There is more to our anatomy than meets the eye!

jabberwocky · 25/07/2005 22:44

Hadn't thought of using vulva vs. vagina but I like it. Almost started a similar thread myself as ds has just started announcing to various people that he and daddy have a penis! He asked me if I did and I just said "No, mommy's don't have a penis." He proceeded to ask the nanny the next day whether she had one LOL. I do prefer using the correct names since we use the proper name for every other body part. Why contribute to a feeling of weirdness about our sexuality by using a funny name for our private parts?

YeahBut · 26/07/2005 09:16

I'm with QueenEagle - in our house the girls and I have a vagina, although the girls say gina (rhymes with China) because it's easier. I think that if we encourage our girls to use the correct words to describe their anatomy we're doing them a great service. There is not one bit of their lovely bodies that is rude, embarrassing or "dirty" enough to warrant a made-up, fluffy name (think someone touched on this subject earlier in the discussion). They'll learn all the stupid, horrible names in the playground - I want them to have the correct information from me.

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