Refusal to tidy up

[geordieminx]

Ok, I know ds is still very young (he's 3 in May), but at the moment we seem to be going through a major phase of refusing point blank to tidy up.

I've tried making it into a game, helping him, encoraging him, rewarding, taking toys away etc etc but nothing seems to work.

Every time I ask him he says "not yet/no/you do it"

It is driving me insane!!

dd went through a spell of this, and still would if I gave her chance! she will use excuses like "I'm a bit tired" "I feel sick" "my finger hurts" etc. She is 2.6

I find only allowing her one toy out at a time really helps. So she is not allowed another toy out until that one has been tidied away. I always help her tidy but refuse to let her do anything until the toy is tidied. This means she can end up sitting on the floor staring at me, or wailing, crying etc until she starts to do it, then I join in and we get it done together. We'll then have a cuddle and get the next toy out.

Sometimes she will throw toys or hit me with them in anger. Then she goes outside the room for time out, but when she comes back she has to help tidy. In the event she consistently refuses to tidy I put it away myself and put it up high so she can see it and not reach it. It stays there for at least a day, sometimes more (depending how important it is to her, the more important, the more she'll miss it, so the shorter it needs to stay on the shelf to serve its purpose), and sge is reminded that the toy is up there because she refused to tidy up.

Not a perfect technique, but it works for us. Unfortunately at nursery she gets awy with these excuses and doesn't tidy, because there is no consequence to any behaviour there.