my 3year old daughter says i dont love you i love my daddy!!!

[sarahsmith4848]

My daughter over the past month keeps telling me she loves her daddy and not me! I am 21 weeks pregnant and my daughter knows i am! It is very hurtfull for me but i dont know what to say to her when she says it? I do say i love her though!! Do you think she is jelouse?? Please help sarah.

sarah When you say she "knows you are" . It's quite a difficult concept for them to fully understand.

She may be made to feel insecure by the news. She sounds very bright. Continue with telling her and showing her that you love her,

I remember my DS told me that i wasn't his mummy 'cos I was a putting a special cream on his eczema that hurt him to start with and that hurt me!

I just ignored it and he was fine and I'm sure yr. DD will be.

Poor you, I'm sure it's just a phase but it must be so hurtful.
My dd age 2.8 constantly tells her dad, and siblings she doesn't love them only mummy. They don't realise at that age how hurtful they are being. No advice really just wanted to let you know you are not alone.
Good luck with the new one.

She doesn't mean it, she has no idea what she's saying. Only that she's feeling a bit unsure about this new baby.

Try not to let on that she's hurting your feelings- she doesn't really want that kind of power over you, she'd probably much rather you helped her sort through her emotions. Ask her not to say it because it's not nice if you like but I would go for lots of cuddles and reassurance.

It might help if you articulate what you think she's feeling for her, ie "you are feeling sad/ angry/upset because of x/y/z" and it will be reassuring for her to know that you don't love her any less because she has these 'bad' feelings.

Must be awful to hear, try not to let it get you down though. It's not your fault at any rate and hopefully just a brief phase.

It's grim and a bit of shock when they start doing this. My DD went through exactly the same phase at 3, sometimes aiming it at me, sometimes at DH.

The quickest way to stop it is just to ignore it completely, or if you feel you have to respond say, 'Oh that's a shame cos I love you loads,' in a normal voice, then change the subject.

It probably won't take long to stop if you take no notice.

DD1 has done this for over a year now. She knows it sometimes gets a rise out of me and does it mainly as a power play thing (ie 'I love Daddy more than you so you can't share my biscuit' type thing)
I spoke to DH and when she does it he makes a point of saying he loves us all, and I say 'well I love you'
It really doesn't bother me that much, I am here all the time (am SAHM) and DH works long hours so he is that much more of a novelty but she will say she loves me and always runs for me when she is hurt/upset.

Just ignore as much as you can, you knwo she doesn't really mean it.