Hair-pulling 8 month old - ouch!

[sassy]

My 8 month old dd is fascinated by grabbing fistfuls of other peoples' hair and pulling hard! Has anyone got any tips on how I can discourage this painful behaviour?

My 8 month old is the same. He just loves hair. I usually say a firm "no" and hold my hand where he can see it in a "stop" sign (like directing traffic!). I leave my hand just in front of his face and then distract him quickly with something else. He's too young to remember "no" each time because the excitement is just too much. A "no" and an alternative plaything is the only wasy forwards for now methinks.

My boy is the same. My solution is to say 'no', remove his hand and always wear my hair up.
He likes my glasses as well and they are forever covered in smudgy little fingerprints

My dd had a phase of biting at about the dame age. Said no firmly for a while but it didn't work so moved on to saying "No" and putting in the travel cot (which she hated) for a few minutes, took about two hours to sort out!!!

DD does respond to 'No' in many situations but hair is just too exciting! I don't mind so much when its my hair (though I wish she'd stop it, obviously )but its a tad embarrassing when the hair belongs to other babies she's made a beeline for at playgroup!! I'm having to be a bit tougher on her now, when she grabs I say no, and put her own on the floor. Hoping she'll see a cause and effect relationship eventually!

My little boy is 1 now but from about 5 months he has loved playing with my hair. I used to have really long hair and it used to dangle in front of his face when he was a baby - I can only assume the fascination started there.

He went from "playing" to "pulling" my hair and although he doesn't do it as much now, he still really yanks my hair and it bloody hurts!!! Sometimes he even gets his legs and feet up to help him get a better grip!!

I have tried saying no so many times but it doesn't make any difference. I have even tried to ignore it and just remove him from my head!!

He also does it to other babies, again, though not as much now he is a bit older but I still can tell when he is going to pounce - especially our friends little girl who has two pigtails on her head - the temptation is just there for him!!!!

Hopefully, they will grow out of it as they get older.

Sassy, I have also 'suffered' from dd's hair pulling which started around 8 months also. The good news is that it is a 'stage'- though I found that no help at all when it was the only advice I received ! But the bad news is that, in my experience, it's a bl**dy long stage ! I had thought that dd, now 20 months, had finally growen out of this a couple of months ago; but unfortunately there've been a few recent recurrences ... maybe I need to take my own advice... Having tried various methods of 'discipline' to change her behaviour, I found that the more upset I got about it, and the more 'heavy' I was, the more she repeated the hair pulling. The best results came from ignoring her as much as possible. Like you, I immediately put her down (and say 'no' if she's in my arms / on my knee and pulls my hair, then just ignore her / walk away for a couple of minutes. As she's got older and understands more I've started explaining that it's not nice to pull hair and that people don't like it because it hurts, but that's not enough motivation to stop ! When she pulls other kids' hair I give them lots of attention, pick them up and take them to mum if they're crying, and again just ignore dd for a couple of minutes. If you have a mum and baby you see regularly maybe you could explain the situation to her so that if dd pulls her baby's hair she will give lots of attention to the upset baby (and make sure your dd can't do it again) and you can deliberately turn away so that your dd isn't getting any reaction at all from you. This has helped with us, and also works when she pulls dp's hair - she will look straight at me waiting for a response, but I turn around or go into a different room and let him get on with separating her fingers from his hair ! Incidentally I've always found getting dd to let go of other people's hair the most difficult bit, and I'm sure I often make it worse by pulling too hard and probably make it hurt for the other kid ! The only tip I have for this (from mumsnet) is to press firmly on the back of dd's hand - apparently it 'forces' the fingers to release, but it's not guaranteed. Last bit of advice - I'm convinced that apart from attention from me, dd is also seeking contact with other kids when she pulls hair - she just doesn't know how to make contact appropriately. So in social situations I 'shadow' her, at least while she's getting used to being around more people, and physicallt show her how to touch other kids without hurting ! Eg stroking hair instead of pulling it / tickling tummies / tickling toes ... this way she has my full attention for longer, and is also learning alternatives to hair pulling. Sorry it's a long post but I really hope some of it can help, as I've been absolutely miserable because of my dd's 'antisocial behaviour' sometimes. Good luck

That was a mistake

Tomps - thanks for ideas and sympathy. The point about avoiding giving attention sounds sensible; I'll give this a go. As for releasing fingers, I've already sussed out that a firm squeeze on the fat part at the bottom of the palm of her hand will do the trick - similar to the advice you saw on mumsnet.

it's nice to have found this thread. Lottie pulls my hair all the time and even when we're walking along and I'm carrying her she'll get the short hairs at the back of my neck right by the hair line and tug. She also pinches my nose, nipples (if she can) and arm. I've told her no really firmly and hope she'll get it eventually. she pulls other kids hair but for some bizarre reason they think it's really funny and it becomes a game! The other day we were in the bath together and she pinched my nose which really hurt, then she slid down me a bit, grabbed a nipple in each had and tugged, I yelped and she slipped down a bit further and put her finger right in my belly button and sort of hooked it as she slipped further down ending up taking a handful of pubic hair in each hand and really pulling!! OMG, I didn't realise a baby could hurt me so much! I think I'll have baths in my swimsuit with her from now on!

Thomcat - ouch!