do 'callenging' girl toddlers turn into nightmare teenagers?

[earlycomputers]

My dd is nearly 4 and for the last 2 years has been incredibly challenging - pushing the boundaries, throwing tantrums all the time, being defiant, etc etc. sticker charts/punishments/rewards/time out etc etc all to no avail.Is this something she will grow out of or am I facing a nightmare teen from hell when she hits 13? Do all challenging toddlers (girls) turn into challenging teenagers (girls)? If so, can anyone recommend any useful strategies or good self help books on the subject?

I have a challenging 3 year old girl too. Hard work, aren't they!

I cling to the fact that my Mum always said that I went through my rebellious teenage phase aged 3-4 and was a fairly easy teenager.

dd1 was a fairly challenging toddler. She wasn't that tantrummy, but wasn't very cooperative. If you asked her to stop doing soemthing she'd nod and smile and carry on anyway. At one point virtually everything was removed from her room, apart from the bed as she couldn't be trusted!

She was lovely from when she started school until she got to about 9ish. Then we went back to constantly pushing boundries and querying everything.

She's not a nightmare teen.... yet! she's only 11 and its still very hard work. She's When she's not being awkward she can be totally lovely

Dd had big tantrums as a toddler and was overall very high maintenance. Perfectly charming 13yo with a great sense of humour and proportion and generally very mature.

I was also a difficult toddler, but ok as a teen (my mum was going through the menopause at the time, so we really didn't have room for more tantrums).

Yes.
No that's not fair, dd has ocd which explains how horrible she was as a child. She can actually be quite nice at 13- but I think hormones have a lot to do with it. I feel like crap every month, and I'm sure she does too, and it's reflected in her behaviour.

My first was an absolute angel up until age 12. Then followed 6 years of nightmare behaviour. Now at age 21 she is a dream and we are very close. My advice, you can only give them good advice you can't make them follow it. As long as they have a solid base and boundries they will grow up and come back to you. We recently adopted a girl who is now nearly 3 and she is completely differant to dd 1. She does what she wants when she wants and listens to no one. I am hoping that means the teenage years will be differant this time.

Well DD1 has certainly been "challenging" all her life (she's 18 now). Some of her teenage behaviour was . I'd just say keep setting the boundaries, keep letting her know you love her even though you are telling her off and keep your sense of humour.

I think if I hadn't kept up insisting on good behaviour from DD1 she would have gone seriously off the rails although it was a very testing time and I am very grateful to my friends for putting up with all my tales of woe about what she had been up to. I could tell you many tales now but I will be kind and spare you!

I'm not sure what I would have done differently now looking back on it all other than not blamed myself so much for her behaviour. DD2 and DS just don't push boundaries in the same way and I haven't done anything different with them. I am sure that DD1 will do well out of life as she is so fiesty that no one will ever walk all over her.