What age do you think it's acceptable for your DDs/DSs to have a girl/boyfriend?

[cocolepew]

Do you feel different about boys or girls? Do you go by their age or their emotional maturity?

I was thinking 27 to be agood age for my DDs.

I think early teens.
But if you disapprove what would you actually do about it?

When they want and can get one.

But then, I have boys. Girls are different. It's a rare 13 year old girl who couldn't get a boyfriend if she was allowed to go out with perverted 30 year old men - but there are precious few 30 year old women who want 13 year old boyfriends (TF!)

Lock them under the stairs.

:-)

It depends on the child and also what they 'mean' by having a Girl / boy friend.

For me, between 10-13.

I would like to add that my parents were EXTREMELY strict and my first boyfriend was at the age of 19 .

So, I can tell you with oh-too-much-clarity that trying to protect your kids too much will only lead to problems later on.

I actually (and I'm not joking or over egging this - I really did!) thought I would marry the first guy I slept with.

And, err... yeah.... he did have something of a major freakout when I mentioned our forthcoming engagement (yes, yes, I know)

Just let things develop.... and keep in mind laws... that has to be a good guideline!

HM

14/16

As another daughter of FAR too strict parents (unreasonable to the point of being utterly, shockingly ridiculous), can tell you that you should probably pick the actual age/time that you officially allow her to date according to her level of maturity, which you know best. However....it is going to happen when it happens anyway, it's a matter of whether or not you will be part of it to guide and support and talk to her - or whether she'll be "dating" in secret without the benefit of your guidance...

My DSs are never going to have a girlfriend.

I may allow them to have a boyfriend

< scared of being a MIL >

My DS1 went from girls are yucky to passionate crushes in a very short few moths when he was 13.
He did mature much earlier than most of his friends. He started going out with a girl in his class 3 months ago. His first girlfriend.
I assumed it would be over in a week, but they are still together and it looks too serious to me. Very difficult to handle as she's a lovely girl but I'm anxious about him being so involved at 14.

And he promised to marry me.

If she's a lovely girl and you can trust them, I wouldn't worry about it being too serious per se at age 14. My boyfriend when I was 14-16 was, although slightly younger than me, far kinder and more mature than many I encountered in my 20s

The relationship gave me a lot of of confidence (and companionship) in my teenage years, and since I was single for a lot of my 20s and early 30s, was also a happy memory!

about 2 years before they're allowed to go unaccompanied to a pub toilet

15+. DD1 is 15 and has so far shown no interest. She is at a girls' school though and knows v few teenage boys. None of her friends have boyfriends either.

I must admit that the whole 'girlfriend/boyfriend' at primary school or young secondary school thing makes me feel v uncomfortable. My girls didn't go through any of that at all and neither did any of their friends, which is a relief.

My DS had a girlfriend age 11, but it was more of a 'token' thing. They texted each other...no hand holding or kissing or anything, I guess you are asking about 'proper' boyfirends, where they start to kiss etc?

I agree, 27 is a good age

At least 82

About 5!

DD comes home from school and tells me exactly which boy in her year each of her girl friends in her class are in love with!

i have just discovered my 15 year old daughter has a boyfriend hes 19, i have asked a few people i know about him and have been told hes very immature for his age am so shocked we have been giving my daughter an allowance to help her to learn to budget and to give her a bit more freedom she has been meeting groups from her drama group and not told us we feel betrayed because she has kept it secret my husband went to check at the bus stop because she was late back from town and saw them together we are totally devastated she was the last person i would expect to think about boys is this too young or are we in the dark ages please help we are beside ourselves with worry. thanks

Paula - you need to CHILL OUT. She hasn't been to a crack den, she's been seeing a boyfriend which is NORMAL and she's probably hidden it from you because she knows you would react like you are doing.

My children can have a boyfriend/girlfriend what ever age they want. I know from being a teenager parents saying no matters very little, teenagers just hide it from them.

I would be more worried about them going out with someone significantly older than them, or under sixteen if they were sixteen or over (due to consent issues if they were sexually active).

I plan to have a lot of embarrassing discussions with them about sexual health, preventing pregnancy, birth control that sort of thing so at least they will be informed. I hope to have a relationship where they can be open with me but I know teenagers often aren't.

Paula, it is normal for your daughter to have a boyfriend at fifteen. He is possibly a bit old for her at nineteen, I wouldn't be so sure about that part. Maybe you could ask him round to meet you and your husband so you could get to know him a bit and hopefully feel a bit more comfortable with him.

Not to scare you but it might be worth talking to your daughter about birth control options if she plans to start a sexual relationship with him (or someone else) in the future. It is good to have these things sorted out ahead of time rather than risk contraception not being used.