Friend smacking her 11 month old twins

[Pknickers]

Just wondering if anyone can advise me. A good friend of mine has 11 month old twins. She is struggling to deal with them and has told me that she has slapped them when they have been crying or, as she puts it, "annoying" her.

The first time she told me this I was so surprised and told her that I didn't think it was a good idea and that if a baby is crying, slapping it isn't likely to help the situation - surely they will only cry more. She seems to get very frustrated with them. Her husband isn't working at the moment so they are both at home taking care of the kids - in other words she does have help with them.

I don't know what to say to her to try to stop this yet also not have her feel judged and unsupported. I don't support her behaviour but I love my friend and I'm worried about her kids. Any ideas?

PracticalCat - had a look at Rollercoaster, thanks a million for the tip - I will pass that on to her and see if it helps. She is inclined not to go out for a walk every day but I do think that would help - we used to walk together but I broke my foot in November so haven't managed to walk much with her recently (great fun with a 10 month old when you are on crutches. Thank God it's over now). She doesn't drive so that is a challenge - I am trying to encourage her to take lessons etc.

Thanks to everyone for their suggestions and advice. I totally agree with all of you that say slapping babies is wrong - I just want to help her see that herself and learn to react differently. Thanks again!

o.k. so i don't have twins, but, You do need to do something to help her. becasue that is just too young. i can't remember how old ds1 was when i first smacked, but he was quite old. we all know its not good and need to find other ways of dealing. isn't it against the law under a certain age ?
she sounds like she just needs a coffee and a sympathetic ear from you. but at the same time she must understand that it must stop. immed. becasue that is just too young.

Do you have homestart in your area? I've looked after quite a few sets of twins now and it is challenging. My last client had someone come out from homestart which has been a great help to her.