2 1/2 year old seems to be struggling to play with her peers. Worried :(

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Hi all DD was 2 1/2 in December but doesnt seem to be able to go and play with children her own age. One on one playdates are fine but she plays better if the other child is bit younger (her 'best friend' is 10 months younger than her) If I go to a playcentre with her and a friend who has a daughter her own age they will chase each other for a while but whereas the other child will find other children they dont know to play with DD will end up playing on her own. She doesnt seem to be bothered by this at the moment but im worried it will always be this way. I always had problems as a child making friends and I dont want my DD to have these problems. Any suggestions on how I could help her to play with others or encourage her to make friends would be a great help. Im off to work in a while but will check online as othen as I can have a skive TIA

Thanks for your reply. No I dont think there is anything wrong with her, shes bright and happy and seems to be a bit ahead in other areas. Its just seeing her play with a child her age and then the other child being able to go off and play with others but DD being left playing on her own. Her friend has got an older sibling though whereas DD is an only child at the moment so I suppose that could contribute to it?

It's a rare 2 1/2 year old who will actually play with another child of the same age. As Ladyintheradiator said, at this stage kids usually play alongside. They only really start to genuinely play "with" other children when they are three or even older.

My DD1 is three and has only just started playing "properly" with her peers. There is a little boy that she's known since they were 6 months old and they've only recently had their first conversation! It seems to happen all of a sudden though, as now she is getting together with children her age and they are organising themselves into games. So there is plenty of time for your DD to learn.

My DS didn't start playing with others preperly till 4+, nursery began thinking he might need help by about 3.5, so they did some extra socialising work with him in the last year before starting school, he's fine now (6). My DD (4) who I consider to be normal in pretty well every respect was slightly later than her peers to play well with others but has done so since 3-3.5 I wouldn't worry about it at 2.5. Both my two are still very happy playing alone, or doing different things alongside each other in a companiable sort of way which I think is good in itself.

She sounds developmentally normal for her age look at this :www.child-development-guide.com/stages-of-play-during-child-development.html

Parallel play is quite normal at this age. She will gradually learn to play with others at about 3+yrs this is called co-operative play.Try not to worry. Some children seem to move from one stage to the next earlier than others but this is usually due to their home/day care environment eg whether they have siblings constantly around them or if they are minded by CM with other children etc

totally, utterly normal. younger or older kids, fine, but children don't do peers for a while. they'll play side-by-side but not interact, it's too early for anything else just yet.

DD is 2.11 and while she seems fond of and talks about children at nursery, she plays with them almost entirely in parallel (although she will carry on conversations with her cousin, whom she knows better). She's also very protective of her personal space at the moment.

I worry more for the feelings of the other children at nursery - they're almost all over 3 and so more interested in playing with her than she with them - I've seen her rebuff a few in a way that makes me a bit sad for them, but I'm sure she'll grow out of it.

I do make the odd remark btw - 'I think maybe that little girl felt a bit sad when you shouted "No! You can't!"' (it was a little girl who I've often seen looking a bit sad, whereas DD is very happy at nursery - in fact picking her up isn't always easy!)

Should I be making this sort of comment as she gets to 3, or should I just let her get on with it?

Your Dd is pefectly normal for her age.Children under 3 usually just play along side each other, At 3 they might begin playing properly with other children but some are nearly 5 before that happens.

I'm going to echo what everyone else has said - your DD is perfectly normal. I used to help out at DD pre-school and nearly all of the children played alongside rather than 'with' other children.
mumeeee is right, for some, perfectly normal children, it doesn't happen 'till they are 5.
Try not to worry

I can understand you are worried, but you are jumping too far ahead and projecting your fears onto her (we all do it at one time or another ....)

I work in a playgroup with 2-4 year olds, and this is totally normal.

Thanks for all your comments and for the link it's good to know that she's doing what she should for her age. I was the first out of my friends to have children so while they learn from me I don't have anyone to take example from lol