Can anyone talk to me about dyslexia and dyspraxia and if/when we should worry? Nearly 5yo boy.

[MarineIguana]

I do not want to shove labels onto DS and I know these things aren't officially diagnosed until later, but DP and I are a bit worried about DS who is 4.8.

He has no more ability with letters and numbers than he had 2 or 3 years ago - in fact a bit less, as he's so not interested and we try not to push it. He can recognise maybe 2 or 3 numbers and one letter (his initial) and that's with encouragement. He is very reluctant to write and when we try to help him to write his name he just wants us to do it. He hardly draws - although he has recently started drawing things that represent objects and can do a basic ball head with stick limbs, so he does gradually make progress. We try to casually show him letters and numbers and help him spot them, eg when going in a lift and he wants to press the buttons - but it doesn't seem to "stick" however many times he is told what a letter is for example.

OTOH - he's verbally very clever, obviously good at thinking about thinks and asking perceptive questions, loves to know how things work, he's hugely imaginative and will make any object into a robot or spaceship etc; very chatty - so doesn't seem to lack intelligence or reasoning power. He can also recognise logos, signs and symbols easily eg he points out Boots, Tesco etc, or the "not for under 3s" sign on toys - his vision seems fine.

And furthermore - he's unbelievably clumsy and lacks coordination. He can walk into any room and find something to trip over and something else to bang his head on. He can fall over from standing still or even sitting. Though he can draw a bit now, he can barely hold or control the pen so it's very messy.

I feel like other parents think I'm a bit hovering or interfering because I often need to step in to stop him really hurting himself doing stuff that other kids his age can manage. I try to hold back when I can but it's hard. E.g. we went for a meal with other families recently and there was an empty bar area where everyone else let their DC go and play, they were climbing up on bar stools and leaping off. Of course DS wanted to join in so he did, but I knew it would end in tears - it was a tiled floor and high bar stools and I was envisioning broken arm or smashed-in teeth. And sure enough he fell - no one else did. Luckily not badly hurt, but it's like this all the time.

Sorry this is long but I would love to hear your experiences - if your older DC definitely has dyslexia/dyspraxia, were they like this to start with? Or conversely have you had a child who was like this but grew out of it? Is there anything extra we should be doing to help him now, or would that be pushy and counterproductive? He starts school this year and I don't know if this is something to talk to teachers etc about or not.

TIA.

We have the same son, mine is nearly 8, as was like yours at the same age!

I ahve to go out now to pick him up from school, but will be back on later to tell you of my experience.

Just to say quickly he has really developed and grown into himself over the last couple of years, learnt to ride a bike, kick a ball, can write sentances, very chatty and bright like you DS! He's had some speech and language therapy and some occupational therapy.

Don't worry, we talk later.

Oh caro thanks so much for your post, I'll look forward to hearing more.

Hi, they say that mums always know best so you'd be wise to follow your instincts and get DS checked if you are worried. Sorry if this is gloomy following the last post but early intervention can make a huge difference.
My daughter has dyslexia and was incredibly bright as a toddler and young child.She started talking at 8 months and was singing whole nursery rhymes at 18 months. It wasn't until she got to school and year 2 that her problems with reading became apparent and if I hadn't made a fuss and paid for a private assesment she'd have been years behind. State schools seem to require a child to be 4 years behind with reading before they will sit up and take note.
She's now 14 and doing ok at school but will never be brilliant at spelling. It took her years to catch up with her chronological reading age and being behind for so long knocked her self confidence.
My son has dyspraxia and dyscalculia and was only recently diagnosed at the age of 12. Dyspraxia manifests itself with a huge range of symptoms and it effects no two people in the same way.
AB is not really clumsy but had terrible problems when younger with writing, using a knife and fork, tying shoe laces and dressing himself.
He's very intelligent, verbally very proficient and has always read very well, is creative and witty. His intelligence helped him bob along in junior school. At senior school though his problems with organisation, forgetfulness, losing books, having difficulty copying from the board etc seem to have avalanched upon him - with resulting behaviour and confidence problems. He's now in the bottom class for everything despite having an IQ over 120.I've always known at the back of my mind that there was something different about my boy and I'm kicking myself that we didn't get it sorted earlier.
Educational psychologists can now make assesments at much earlier ages so if you are worried get it checked out.

In year 1 he made no progress at all, never got any spellings right, could barely write, hated school and his teacher who was total crap. We found most of this out when he went to year two and his new teacher said he was no where near what his end of year report from year 1 had said. The head called us in for a meeting and said the school had let us and him down badly.

He has always been a bit clumsy, falling over from standing up, falling of his chair whilst sitting, walking into things etc etc. He seemed just totally off balance, he got totally enraged one night as he could not go on a Beavers bike ride with the rest of them as he could not ride his bike. He can now thankfully, he was 7 before he could, now he is very fast.

His year 2 teacher called us in 6 weeks after the start of the new term and explained that she thought he was showing signs of dyslexia and would it be ok if the school SENCO (special educational needs co-ordinator - most schools have one) did a screening test at school. She did at it came back that he had moderate dyslexia, I cried, but it really made us all understand why he was having such trouble grasping the reading.

He was then put on an IEP (individual education programme) with specific targets each term. His teacher and teaching assistant were bloody spectacular helping him with all his key words, spending time with him, extra time for homework,when he got over tired in class (dyslexic brains work three times as hard trying to decifer all the info) she let him go on the laptop or look at books. His confidence shot up 100% and he loved year 2.

Dyslexia Action do a private screen test, more indepth but it costs £500! I got a few books about it from the library and most of the symptoms fit. I would like to take him out of school at some point once a week for private dyslexia lessons, but they are £35 a week and finances won't permit at present.

This year, year 3, he is flying, his teacher and TA are again brilliant, really tailoring his learning to him. The SENCO has also got lots of new materials, workbooks, books etc that he is working through. Like you DS he is super chatty had brilliant ideas, is confident, had lots of mates and is really interested in science and history.

With the dyspraxia thing, I took him to the docs as his teacher suggested it, I mentioned the dyslexia and possible dyspraxia symptoms and she referred us to a peadiatrician (can'tr spell) and he did a full assessement and reccomended that we see a speech and language therapist (SALT) and occupation therapist (OT). He has three sessions with the SALT who said all was good, he scored above average on most test. Again with the (OT) assessed him in the hospital with various exercises and again in school. The upshot is he has some issues with balance and co-ordination and is going to attend a OT group for kids of his age one a week for ten weeks at our local hospital after Easter, where they work on this. It's called something but I can't recall as I have not had the paperwork yet. His fine motor skills are great eg: building Lego, drawing but its his gross motor skills where the issues are eg: co-ordination and balalnce.

All this took about 18 months, half of me thought is this just part of being a boy and developing, or is there something more? I think it is a bit of both, he has really grown up and into himself over the past year, naturally.

Both are not big massive issues, really just niggles that have to be worked on and dealt with. I found a Mum with two teenage boys with dyslexia and she was brilliant to talk to. It's a slow gentle process and out progress has been good.

The spectrum for both is varied and wide ranging, so your DH might not be on it at all or just have pockets.

Have your teachers ever said anything to you? It would be worth making an appt and having a chat. He is still only 5 and I can say for us the years between 5 and 7 and been really good in terms of development and understanding. There is no quick fix solution to any of it.

He has just move on to stage 6 books this week and is so pleased with himself!

Does that help? Have I waffled on too much, spelling terrible! Please feel free to ask me anything you like!

I also sometimes wonder if it was something to do with the fact he was born 5 weeks early, never crawled, but then again we had a flat with wooden floors so it was easier to bum shuffle! He has always been in the later stages of 'normal' on the development charts.

ds(11) is dyspraxic and was similar with fine and gross motor skills but ok in terms of learning and speech. This site may help with lookinfg at his development to date. Does he have a hand preference yet as lack of can indicate whether there may be such an issue ?

Subsequently an Educational Psychologist has identified ds has a verbal skill 4+ years in advance but a significant lag in writing and drawing. Still has poor physical coordination, dislikes team sports, sensory issues with regard to noise and bustle, now using a laptop rather than hand writing and so on.

You could ask gp to refer you now to a developmental peadiatrician and maybe in turn Occupation Therapy. School may well support this but unlikely to identify dyslexia for a few year yet (7 is normal age to assess). hth

My DS (nearly 5) is dyspraxic with some sensory processing problems-I also feel he could be on the spectrum as finds some social situations difficult. He is also hugely imaginative and very very emotional.He was relatively easy to diagnose as his speech was so obviously dyspraxic but motor skills were similar to your DS and I had a gut feeling something was wrong relatively early on mainly because he walked so late (21 months) although hit all other milestones appropriately.

He has had no issues with reading but huge issues with writing-sounds like your DS. I agree with others-always err on the side of caution-with lots of OT and speech therapy my DS coming on very well and the earlier you get in the better-ask for a referral to community developmental paed and OT for an assessment-it could take ages and I found it helpful to have stuff inplace before recpetion as school initially threw him completely...let me know how you go...

My DS is left handed for writing only and does everything else eg: brushing teeth, eating, catching with his right. Unusual but not uncommon.

you could have written that about my ds he is 7, we only really noticed something wasn't quite right around sept last year. He also suffers with terrible headaches,backaches and tummy aches all at the same time.

He has been referred to a pead and she is taking this stuff very seriously, he also has hydrocephalus- that has been ruled out of causing the issues with him.

He is losing skills, and is a differnet child to this time last year. He can't run for mor ethan about 90 seconds and still can't ride a bike or swim on his front. He is very bright verbally and with his imagination, and abstract thinking is his thing. He didn't walk until he was nearly 18 months and he didn't talk until 2. He did however sign, he also never crawled and still can't.

we always put his lack of interest and motivation down to the fact that we did everything fo rhim and he was a'king'. Now we are having issues with getting the school mainly to accept something is wrong, so i would follow your instincts and get the ball rolling so to speak now, because it is a long proces. Good luck and i hope everything works out for you.

the otehr thing my ds does is write with both hands in the same sentence, so will start at the left hand side of the paper writing in his left hand and when he gets to the middle of the page will just swap hands and continue writing in his right hand until he reaches the right side of the paper, we love to tell him this is what makes him unique and it is a great skill to have .

Thank you all so much, especially for taking the time to write at length - this is all making a lot of sense. He never crawled or shuffled - he just sat around until he could walk! - though he did walk and meet most baby milestones on average time. He still hasn't decided on handedness. Has real trouble with bike pedals - he's fine on a pedal-less bike but can't master the turning action.

He meets maybe about 3/4 of the dyspraxia list you linked to LIZS, but some things don't match at all eg he has strong imaginative play, though generally alone rather than with others, and no language probs that I can see (though he does make a lot of new words up). But it's enough to ring alarm bells tbh.

He's at a private day nursery rather than pre-school and they have not raised these concerns in particular, although they do give him a lot of attention and remark on how smart and different/eccentric he is (in a sensitive way and not undermining him). But I could have a chat with them and maybe talking to the GP is the next step. Private is a possibility if necessary but I will see what GP says first.

Your school sounds great Caro, hope we can be so lucky if that's what we need.

I think you just have to go throught the process, here in Cheshire (normal state primary school) we have this thing called Parent Partnership, run by volunteers, who advise you about what you can do, what the school can and should do, also ensuring they do take notice of you, you don't have to be pushy. The school is great, more the sum of the teachers than the overall school policy and what yo do at home.