When does it work to discipline a 1 year old?

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My DS has just turned 1 and is a very curious boy. He is drawn to things like the lap top/DVD player/mobile phones etc. He also loves drawers/cupboards/the toilet(!).

What's the best way to discpline him from playing with these potentially dangerous and breakable things? Most times I can distract him with something else and I also change the tone of my voice and show him I'm not pleased when I tell him not to do certain things, but I'm not sure how much he understands.

Any advice?

erm..move the breakable things

Put stuff out of his reach. You can't "discipline" a baby. Put unbreakable, non-precious stuff in the drawers he can reach; put everything else away from him. Give him an old mobile 'phone to trash (although he'll eventually notice the difference ), put the toilet seat down and keep the bathroom door shut. hth.

how much he understands - virtually nothing

advice - shut the bathroom door / get stair gates

I think that's pretty much all you can do.
I also give dd a remote with batteries taken out and old phone.
Other than that I just tell her 'no' and sometimes she stops , sometimes not...
Babies don't understand discpline- what can you do? Put him on a naughty step?
It's up to you to make sure all fragile or dangerous things are outside his reach.

Agree - discipline does not work at that age, and in fact is worse than useless in that I think it is cruel as they do not understand that some things are valuable/breakable/irreplaceable. Everything is interesting and to be explored, so it is up to you to keep your DS and your stuff safe from each other .

Move things out of reach
Close doors
Give redundant/broken phones/remote controls etc to play with
Do say "no" firmly and remove item but don't bother discipling
And yes, distraction is the way forward.

When they are 2 however, and realise "their" remote does not actually put the telly on... Gah!!!

He understands very little and certainly wontl rememebr not to do it next time. He acts on impulse not out of deliberate mischief although he may relish any attention he gets for in advertently doing something you perceive he shouldn't. Remove what you can from tempted fingers, childcatch any drawers and cupborads which contain hazards or precious things ormake child safe a whole room where he can play with no restrictions. It will be a good year or two ebfore he grasps the limitations and even longer to comply !

In meantime have things on standby so you can remove him calmly and distract.

I'm in exactly the same situation - having had a DD who really didn't cause any problems in this respect it is a shock to now have DS who is into everything! The day after he started to pull himself up we had 2 toys in the toilet so now have a seat down and door closed if possible rule. We gave DS an old remote control with no betteries, but he can sense that it's different and still goes for the functioning ones because they light up! He smiles when we say 'no'! I'm just trying to get through these months with the least breakages/damage (to him and stuff) until he can understand what he is doing is not allowed!

Agree with the others - I also had a kitchen cupboard which I let the dcs in - pans, plastic bowls, baking trays, tupperware boxes etc and they loved that.

My children all understood the word 'No' at this age, or rather they understood the tone in which it was said, and would mostly stop and look at me when I said this.

'no, that's dangerous/naughty/' and then move him away or take the pen or whatever away from him.

I think babies understand more then what we give them credit for.

Do you think they remembered it though Belgo? Mine would stop if I said "no" firmly, but they would not remember what it was I had told them not to do the next day.

no but my five year old still doesn't remember to tidy her clothes up every night but that doesn't stop me from telling her every night!

my 15 month old definitely remembers that he is not allowed to do some things because he giggle when I see him doing it, even before I say anything.

My 11mo DD now understands'no' and the tone of voice. WE say it when she goes to touch the tv stand and the fireplace. She now knows she can't touch them, though she still does if she is really interested. Yesterday, her ball rolled over to the tv stand. She crawled over to it but didn't get it, she sat pointing at it and waited for DH to get it for her. This was unusual restraint on her part though to be fair

We've been working on the 'no' thing for a few months now and she really does appear to understand it. I think she is too young for discipline ie. naughty step or punishment, but I don't see this as discipline, its more like training her to do/not do the things I want.

We have a TV cabinet that the TV stands on, the DVD, cable box etc are in the cabinet which used to have ornate brass handles so you could open the cabinet to insert a DVD etc.

I say "used to have" because every crawling or toddling baby we had used to make a bee-line for the handles so we removed them and have to open the doors by pulling the bottom of the cabinet (sigh) it's a pain but it's worked so far.

I think you have to adapt your home rather than "teach" a baby.

That way madness lies

aaaaargh the toilet phase, in our household now superceded by the bin emptying and turning on taps really fast phase.

DS2 (21 months) certainly understands no. In fact he says it and laughs before doing something dangerous/messy.

As other posters have said, all you can do is keep him at arms length and child proof your house as much as possible. One phase will follow another until, in a couple of years, they become civilised(ish) members of society.

Good luck.

I think their is alot of variation on 1 year olds though, at 12 mo they understand very little by 18 mo they can remember which cupboard the biscuits are in so can prob remember they are allowed to touch the bin.

I do not think anybody here is suggesting to just let them get on with whatever they are doing; obviously a firm "no" and tone of voice and remove is the thing to do.

The OP asked about 'disciplining' and that IMO is pretty useless at this stage.

At 1 year they v innocently explore and at 2 years they test boundaries, which I find harder! Like acebaby's DS, mine 22 months giggles when told no, or waits for me to see what he is up to ie drawing on the wall, gah!

DS is 13mo and he has his own, non functional, remote for the tv. He does turn and smile when he reaches for things he shouldn't, agree you can only remove stuff and prevent access.

I remember DD getting to about 18/20months and she would shout 'get down' as she climbed up the chair/coffee table/whatever

I was told by a HV that until around 2yo children don't really understand consequences, so although you can say 'no' and hope they will understand/remember, there is no point in 'disciplining' ie giving a consequence for them doing something, as they won't relate the two things together.

So - try saying No (in firm/deep tone of voice), distracting, having 'allowed' cupboards/busy boxes, and keeping the items you can out of reach etc. Ikea do great locks that we used on the toilet, if you have a local Ikea. And I'm afraid this stage may go on for quite a while yet... even when you do say 'no' it then depends on whether they choose to listen!

Agree with the fact that you can't "discipline" them this young. I also don't think that "naughty" is relevant to a one year old - they are not being naughty, they are being babies. In fact, I can't discipline my (only just) two year old. He generally understands what he is not supposed to do, but frequently does it anyway and all we can do is remove him and ditract him. Discipline (ie teaching consequences and responsibility) comes much later.
Saying that, however, the one thing that worked very early on for both of mine was yelling "hot" if they got too close to the oven/radiator. They picked that up very quickly, so if I ever had a lazy day where I am sick of asking him not to switch the lamps on and off I will occasioanlly use the "hot" word.

Discipline is about more than just punishment though. I agree there is absolutely no point in punishment at this age, but you can start discipline by using key words, e.g. "Hot" "Dangerous" "Dirty" (I do use "no" but try to avoid it as a small child hears the word no and thinks "What is it that's wrong? Touching this? Walking? Walking this way? Touching it with my hand?") - and you absolutely have to back up the word with an action. So "Dirty" while removing them from the toilet, or "Hot" just as they touch the radiator (They are very unlikely to burn themselves on a radiator unless they get trapped up against it, e.g. between radiator and sofa) or you move the cup of tea. You can use "No" as a catch-all but again don't assume they will know what it means, you have to move them or remove the forbidden item as you say it. It takes a long time for it to become second nature for them to react to ust the word.

agree that there are a hundred definitions of discipline. I absolutely think you can teach a baby this age not to touch certain things, and also what you would like them to do. I sbsolutely don't think a baby this age understands wrong and right. So firmly but kindly reinforcing what you do and don't want them to do. My ds (15 months) learnt not to touch the coals in our fire (cold of course!) by ten months by moving him away and saying no (generally I would use hot, dirty etc, but sometimes just no). I would minimise the things he/she can't touch but not eliminate altogehter, otherwise stores up problems for other people's houses. But naughty step? punishment? reward charts? up for debate at any age, simply pointless at one

Really interesting thread. Being more specific is a great idea Bertiebotts. I do tend to find myself shrieking 'NOOOOOO' about a million times a day, which obviously doesn't do much good.

my ds is 14 months. We just moved most stuff out of the way. just easier all round!!

One thing that worked for us was ignoring him when he was trying to get attention for doing something we had asked him not to (pulling thr wire on the baby monitor). We just turned away and chatted animatedly to each other. He doesn't like it when he is not the focus of our attention and leaves it alone now.

Thanks for your responses. Interesting and some useful tips. Good to know it's all to be expected. My DS explores things so innocently and with such excitement - he's not destructive about it or cheeky pushing boundaries - so I don't want to stifle his curiosity and learning. At the same time I don't want to go insane!!