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Behaviour/development

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Original poster

Failed Dummy Cold Turkey at first hurdle - help!

14 replies

skandi1 · 29/01/2010 09:57

My 6 months old DD has a dummy for sleep times. Until a couple of weeks ago she would sleep thru 7 to 7 and put her summy back in herself if needed during the night. However over the last couple of weeks she has kept calling for me to go and put her dummy back in 3 to 5 times per night. She also started to ask (moan) for the dummy during the daytime which she previously didn't. I had intended to take the dummy before Christmas but as I was in the process of giving up breastfeeding over Christmas and New Year, I felt it would be too much to take all her comfort away in one go.

I decided that perhaps giving up the dummy might be the way forward. So I put her to bed last night without dummy - cue some wailing. However after 20mins or so she fell asleep. However she woke again at 11:30 and by 1 am, despite patting and reassurance, she was in full on wailing mode. I picked her up to give her a cuddle and she launched herself at my boob for comfort - something she hasn't done at all during or after giving up breastfeeding. So I broke, literally, and went and got her dummies and she went right to sleep.

I felt terrible for her as I think she seems to need the comfort from the dummy more now that she isn't breastfeeding.

But she clearly won this one (doesn't bode well for future battles....) and I don't want to get up 5 times a night to give her the dummy.

Help! Any good ideas out there???
All suggestions appreciated!

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JGBMum · 29/01/2010 10:07

I'm not sure whether you want help getting your daughter to give up her dummy - can't help as mine were nearly 2 before they "sent" their dummy to Santa in exchange for a small gift (dont ask!), if you are looking for a way to help your daughter find her dummy in the night I found these type of things very useful.
Look at this page

BambinolovesBeccie · 29/01/2010 12:13

Skandi1, does she throw her dummy out of the cot at all, so you will come in? Reason I ask is that DS suddenly started doing this and he is teething. Could that be the root cause for your DD perhaps? I feel your pain, we've been waking up 5 or so times per night for a month now.

I am just telling myself that it's a phase and will pass like everything else.

mrsjuan · 29/01/2010 12:22

DD's dummy was driving me mad until she learnt to put it back in herself at night at about 7.5 months. Now we leave a few in her cot and she usually manages to find one and settle herself back off in the night.

I was all for gradually getting rid of it before then as it was getting to be such a pain getting up every hour to put it back in but now I think we'll stick with it for the time being as everyone is happy.

So give yourself a few weeks and you may become very grateful for the dummy!

ljhooray · 29/01/2010 12:42

I tried about this age too and just couldn't do cold turkey either. Did what others here did and waiting (think it was 15-16 mths) and told her we would give them to the babies for her as she wasn't a baby and didn't need them (she was going through that phase!) Two nights of some unhappiness but generally quite easy.

There are some out there who have done it at 6 mths but like you, the screaming was something I couldn't bear.

Original poster

skandi1 · 29/01/2010 12:42

BambinolovesBeccie & mrsjuan,

She doesn't throw it out of the cot and she has up until the last couple of weeks happily put it back in herself.

It seems she has become "lazy" and calls for me to put it back in.

I've tried a dummy clip but she still calls. She was teething a few weeks back when the bottom teeth came in but she was happy then to put it back in herself.

I'm not sure whether to carry on with the dummy clip and dummies in the cot and leave her to it rather than go in when she calls or attempt to take them away again but by a different method rather than cold turkey??

Any other ideas???

OP posts:

ljhooray · 29/01/2010 12:43

Sorry forgot to say a word of warning - I think if you can get rid, I would as the constant back and forth in my experience never really went away, even with lots of dummies in the cot.

posieparker · 29/01/2010 12:45

Cold turkey??? why?

We clip the dummy onto ds's sleeping bag.

mrsjuan · 29/01/2010 13:12

Oh - perhaps we have that phase still to come - aghhh! I'm not getting too used to the good nights' sleep!

Perhaps, as she can put it in herself she is just going through a bit of phase and really wants you just for a bit of reassurance?

Personally I wouldn't get rid of the dummy having just given up breastfeeding but I know how hard it is having a very broken night's sleep.

Is there anything else that she uses as a comfort? Cuddly toy? Your clothes etc?

Good luck whatever you decide

BambinolovesBeccie · 29/01/2010 13:29

Really stupid question here. I have one of those dummy clips but have always been afraid to clip it onto his clothes at night in case it got caught on something and strangled him. Am I being OTT?

mrsjuan · 29/01/2010 13:42

The clip we've got isn't anywhere near long enough to strangle. I would be surprised if yours is but if so just tie a knot in it.

I worried that it would be uncomfortable when DD rolled onto her side or tummy and she obviously agrees because everytime I clip it onto he grobag she manages to rip it off and post it through the bars in her cot

BambinolovesBeccie · 29/01/2010 14:38

Thanks MrsJuan. I have the same as the ones linked here but mothercare own brand, they aren't that long, I'm just PFB. I will tie a knot in - great idea thanks. DS also wears a grobag so I'll clip to that.

pranma · 29/01/2010 17:16

dgs sent them to the 'dummy lady'when he was just turned 3.He spoke early and clearly and his teeth are straight.If dummy is kept for bed whats the harm?

mrswill · 30/01/2010 13:46

skandi - have you heard of a 'Sleepytot'?

We had this problem with DD, and failed in our attempt to get the dummy off her. So we bought a sleepytot, and you can fix the dummies in the paws, so it is bigger and their more able to find around the cot. It also stops the dummies rolling out onto the floor through the bars of the cot. We havent had a sleepless night since we've bought it.

its on www.sleepytot.com.

penona · 31/01/2010 21:02

We used to put lots of dummies in the cot so they could always find them, and use cot bumpers so they couldn't fall out. They did go through a phase of not being able to find them though (a few weeks) but got over it.

But it sounds as if your DD can find them, but just wants you for some reason. Which might be nothing to do with the dummy - could be scared of the dark (nightlight needed?) teething again, growth spurt, unsettled from a new food,??? Actually at this age could be a heap of things - by the time you work it out the phase will be over!

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