Arriving/Leaving Nursery

[StokieSaint]

Hello - my eldest son who has just turned 3yrs old has become impossible when it comes to nursery.

He loves it there, but when dropping him off and picking him up he kicks, screams, hits and refuses to go/leave.

It is not only embarrassing but really upsetting as I feel that I must be doing something wrong?

Can anyone give me any advice, I have tried explaining to him, I have tried rewards and I've tried ignoring him, I've even left without him and he wasn't bothered in the slightest.

Please help!!!

If you knew this answer to this one, you could write a book and make your fortune!!

I would say that it is just a phase, and to be firm i.e. when dropping him off, go along with the "You'll have a lovely time, I love you, see you later," and go quickly, be very upbeat and positive ( even if not inside ) and at the end, the same thing, bustle your way through, make it quick and slick.

If he finds a particular part difficult for whatever reason, make it as short as possible!

Maybe phone your key-worker during a session to discuss your plan re the ends of the session, they may well have advice, but don't try to have this conversation in front of him.

In time you will see other parents going through this sort of thing, and you will be very understanding!

Re leaving him, the best thing to do is to take him in, say goodbye, see you later, have a nice day etc very quickly, hand him over to staff and get yourself out quickly.

Don't know about the pickup. Personally at that age, I would have scooped the child up regardless of kicking/screaming and just carried him to the car.

If it helps - DS is 3.6 and has been going to nursery 2 days a week since 10 months and now his sister - 1 year - also goes. He sees her every morning being handed over without a backward glance. He on the other hand will still burst into tears and have to be extracated from me with a promise of waving from the window. He does the same at pre-school two mornings a week. I often have a chat with him before we go in about the tears and leaving and that he's a big boy and that mummy will be back later to get him and can I have a kiss and a cuddle and no tears please (!) and sometimes it works and sometimes doesn't !... I think some are just more prone to the separation anxiety than others - DS is always absolutely fine 2 seconds after I've gone so I really can't get too worked up about it myself !...I might sound a bit hard but I can see him almost turn on the dramatics for me but know he loves nursery and pre-school. Does he talk positively about it ??

PS please don't be embarassed - we have all been there honestly !!......they just know how to push our buttons in a big way !