Dd started screaming if anyone came in the house unless she was being held by me at around 7 months. It started soon after my Mum had her for a couple of hours so that I could help out with one of her brother's school trips. Nothing untoward happened while I was away, she had been left with Mum for the odd hour previously with no problems and she was all smiley and happy when I returned after the school trip.
At the time I wasn't too concerned, as I thought it was just developmental stranger awareness and she'd grow out of it.
At first it was just my Mum she and she would start screaming as soon as we opened the front door to her, even if she was being held, but she was a lot worse if she was playing on her playmat or in her swing when Mum came in. Since then she has very slowly got to the point where if Mum stays for a couple of hours, she will eventually go down and play, but if I stand up to step into the kitchen and make a coffee, she screams the place down, despite the fact she can see where I am I the whole time I'm in the kitchen.
If anyone else comes to the house she screams as soon as she sees them, unless she's being held by me and I have to hold/carry her the whole time they are there or she works herself up into a frenzy.
I have tried leaving her to see if she will settle, but she very quickly gets into a complete panic and works herself up to the point that she can't stop screaming.
I don't have a clue how to deal with this. My eldest ds has Aspergers, never developed stranger awareness and would willingly go to anybody without so much as a backward glance (still would really) and ds2 has always been really sociable and only went through a very short period of being shy with 'real strangers'.
Dh has just been invited to his company's annual black tie event. Its a huge deal to be invited and is frowned upon if wives don't accompany their husbands. He was so pleased and excited when he told me, but we have had to face facts that I won't be able to go as dd just won't be left with anyone even for the evening and this particular event involves an overnight stay at a hotel in Manchester (we are in the south of the West Midlands).
Its really starting to get me down now. I can't even go to the toilet or make drinks when we have visitors, both Mum and my sister are now visiting less as they don't feel as welcome as they used to and my MIL is highly offended that dd screams every time she tries to interact with her.
As a result of all this, I feel like I'm mising out on a large part of my support network and am starting to feel really trapped, as I can never have any time off, not even for one evening.
Any advice would be really appreciated.