For all of you lot who have tvs in your kids rooms

[fishfinger]

i made ds1 read this this morning

[CountessDracula]

Blimey QoQ you are in a tizz, chill out!

Surely I am entitled to my opinion as well. If you really think that having daytime tv droning on is more rewarding than good music or an interesting program on R4 then of course that is up to you. I also don't see the point of letting kids have tellys in their rooms when there is a perfectly good one in the living room.

[Enid]

QofQ this argument is not personal to you.

having said that your logic is totally bizarre - people do manage to watch programmes they want to without having the tv on all day to 'remind' them. Also, I think what CD was trying to say was that she didnt have a tv in her room although tvs were available and she hasnt suffered - the argument isn't about not having a tv at all. Also noone has suggested that tv has no educational benefits.

As you don't have a tv in your boys bedrooms I fail to see why you have taken this all so personally - I do think it is depressing that you have the tv on all day, although you seem to have backpedalled on that as you often have the radio on through the tv - so you don't have the tv on all day at all. I find it hard to follow any logic in your arguments at all tbh.

[puddle]

I don't understand why you would have the tv on all day when no-one is watching it. Just don't get it. Not very green either. When you think of the electricity wasted just having the standby light on.

[QueenOfQuotes]

Enid - we DO have the TV on all day - if we 'listen' to the radio it's through the TV (can't get any of our favourtie radio stations on the normal radio).

I'm not ruling out letting DS's have a TV in their room once their older - I remember as a teenager (when we did finally get a TV) HATING having to sit through what they were watching and not being able to watch stuff that was of more interest to me.

The same went for the radio - some of the stuff my parents listened to was naff (and sorry I can't STAND R4 even now) and I would much prefered to have been able to listen to the radio in my bedroom - but wasn't even allowed my own radio!!!

Teenagers naturally like to have their 'own space' - and as someone else said some 'live' in their rooms when not out socialising - if my DS's want a TV in their rooms so when friends come over, or if they're just on their own, they want to veg out for a while without "mum and dad" intereferring so be it!

And as for me being in a tizz?? Why do you think I finished my last post with two "winks" if I was in a tizz??????

Just don't understand why some of you lot are getting so het up about the fact that kids might not want to watch what mum and dad are watching - that's why DS1 sometimes watches a video in our bedroom while DS2 is sleeping at the weekend.

[QueenOfQuotes]

"people do manage to watch programmes they want to without having the tv on all day to 'remind' them."

as I said when you're busy (trying do work from home, be a full time mum and part time director of music at church) sometimes the old grey cells don't "work" properly - the programme planner doesn't work with the TV switched off (naturally ) so if it's on DS's can watch Thomas the Tank Engine and Teletubbies without mummy forgetting to change channel, I can watch Brainteaser or other programmes, and DH can watch the news without suddenly realised we've missed half of it!!!!

I honestly wish I had a better memory than you lot!!

[Caththerese1973]

I think I may as well admit that my child watches TV so I can have a rest from her. But I don't think it does her any harm. In certain contexts it is handy to have the tv - eg if you are a single parent and trying to cook the dinner and can't handle a two year old who wants to be constantly carried or to 'help' you put the pasta in the boiling hot water.
My ex-husband was very down on me about our dd's tv watching. but he didn't have to look after her all day. tv may not be actively beneficial, but at least it is physically safe (provided the lil' darling doesn't decide to get behind the box and started investigating the plugs and outlets, as mine was doing the other day!)

[Lizzylou]

I won't let my DS have a TV in his room, I was horrified when he knew how to switch the TV on and off the other week, he is only 16mths and we do have the Tv on for about 2/3 hours a day when he's not at nursery...but not anymore...we have had much better and "concentrated" play since I switched the Tv off...
I do admit that at 6am, when he's already been up for 1 hour I let him watch Teletubbies and Tikkabilla...but he really only dances to the music and I think I may go mad if I didn't get any break!

[Lizita]

I grew up without a TV too. QoQ I too can't understand why you have it on all day as background, perhaps making up for not having one when you were growing up? When dd was a baby I watched a hell of a lot of TV (watched, not as background ) to stave off boredom, but now only the odd programme, and dd watches about an hour a day (could be it's more than that but wouldn't care to admit it!). Re mealtimes: In terms of "family meals" I don't like the tv on, but if I eat by myself after dd's gone to bed i ALWAYS eat in front of the TV, too bored otherwise.

I'm so glad this discussion exists cos I have wondered a lot about monitoring TV watching as dd gets older (she's nearly 2) as I grew up without one. I believe that watching too much TV does affect development (haven't read the article but have heard that the very fast flickering images affect concentration skills for life) and for that reason wouldn't risk putting a TV in dd's room until she's a teenager and can learn to take responsibility for herself. (Although, i'm v worried about missing my progs cos dd wants to watch something else!) But, I am very anxious that dd isn't isolated from her school mates the way i was, (qoq did you often have someone say "Did you watch... oh no, you don't have a tv" and then turn to someone else? In fact these days I still sometimes have friends waffling on about programmes they watched as a child - thank god for those top 20 kids tv type programmes!) The isolation included even like fashion awareness & modern culture awareness etc, really dented my confidence tbh. (Just glad for school uniform!) So i do want her to watch a certain amount of what the other kids are watching.

Sorry this has kind of deviated from what the thread was about... I too believe that TVs in kids rooms aren't the problem, it's the amount watched. Posts on this thread have proved that! I am just sceptical about having a TV in a kid's room cos how do you know how much & what they're watching (esp when a bit older)?

[Lizita]

Re read my message - said dd "watches" an hour a day, but as someone pointed out further down, she doesn't actually, she potters around doing other stuff rather than staring at the tv.

[QueenOfQuotes]

Dh watches MUCH more TV than me - and he had one growing up - which he watched an AWFUL lot, certainly hasn't affected him in the long run - he's still got enough concentration to set up our own business

And I said often we use the TV for radio - so no flickering pictures, no 'flashing' lights etc - just a blue screen with the programme information......



As for being isolated - hell yes that happened an awful lot (still does - all my friends talking about programmes I didn't know were on, or had forgotten to stick on the programme planner

Infact talking to some of my RL friends who religiously turn the TV on and off for certain programmes (ie "never" have it on unless they're watching) I think some of them 'watch' more than I do!!!

As I've already said - I STRONGLY believe that watching a lot of TV only has an adverse effect if other 'factors' aren't in place.

[Lizita]

I don't care any more if people are watching something i'm not watching, just when i was a teenager or even a little girl it was very, well, confidence denting as i said! Now, i choose what i do & don't watch and don't give a stuff what other people watch. did gain lots from growing up without a tv though - people always say "What did you DO?" when i tell them, well, we read lots, wrote stories, played on the street with our friends, did plays, played with our toys, etc etc etc. and i am also v glad to have grown up with a healthy scepticism towards advertising, silly programmes etc (though i do watch a lot of them )

[Lizita]

oooh ps i don't mean to say other kids i grew up with didn't do those things, but it stands to reason we did a hell of a lot more than they did. i know i've always been a bigger reader than any of my friends, for example. also i want to ensure dd has those opportunities too.

[PeachyClair]

The only thing my kids have in their rooms re beds, clothes (in cupboards obviously ), lego and books. Doesn't mean they sleep well though.

We thought about a Tv for a while when Sam wasnt settling until the early hours (he has sn) but Consultant asvised against it.

We own 3 TV's, but I have no idea whatsoever where two are, cupboard, shed, attic????

Kids have been told they can have a TV / Video combi for christmas but they will keep in the playroom for day use only.

[Lizita]

Oh yeah, also meant to include a note about my parents: my mum listens to R4 ALL THE TIME and it bugs me, she has it loud so she can go in & out of the kitchen, and has the same glassy-eyed look as if she was watching TV.
And, my parents have no idea how to watch the TV in a sociable way. (They did buy one eventually but hardly ever watch it). Explanation: one evening I was chuffed when we all sat down to watch some TV as a family (first time ever other than films) and my dad spent the whole time talking about how rubbish it was, and my mum sat with her eyes glued with anything else unable to get through to her (i remember being like that when we first got a tv). Grrrr.

[Enid]

you are mad if you are trying to argue that having the tv on all day actually somehow limits your tv watching.

so is it on now?

is anyone watching it?

turn it off

[PeachyClair]

Dh is watching news at the mo, best not turn it off!

I use the TV for company at night when dh is at work and I am alone (kids in bed) even if I am card making or something, it just makes me feel less vulnerable

[Tortington]

if no one is watching it i turn it off - sometimes i absolutley value quietness. i often harken back to my only child days when things were quiet.

[PeachyClair]

I was one of three, I don't mind a bit of silence, but not for too long!

[starrynight]

My DD just got a tv in her room (she is 10) and she watches about an hour a week on it (excellent use of money!). I got it so she could have a break from her younger brother and sister sometimes (5 & 4) but she's like me and prefers to read.

There's an awful lot of tv snobbery on here! As long as you don't sit your kids there for 10 hrs a day I think tv is fine. Mine watch TV rarely, though its available but we get out a video once a week and thats all they really watch.

I agree with the posters who think its far more important that your kids have other activities, books read to them & available, crafty activities, outdoor activities, sit down to a family meal every day, play with their toys & have interested and supportive parents. If that is the case a tv in their room for watching for half an hour wouldn't make a jot of difference! I think the study was talking about kids who watch hours and hours isolated every day - thats a different kettle of fish.

I, on the other hand lurve to slob about in front of the telly of an evening.

[PeachyClair]

Well said Starrynight! Give my kids a choice between something 'interesting' (usually crafty stuff in our house, but outside stuff too) and the TV doesn't get a look in.

They seem to prefer wildlife progtammes to Tikkabilla too, and I think that is GREAT for them. TBH, at £50 a shot for our family, it's a damned site more affordable (as in, I CANNOT afford often) and they still get to learn.

[miggy]

Fascinating to see the range of permutations here, ie no tv/tv on all day etc. My 3 all have tvs in their bedrooms but all only play videos/dvds. DD watches hers about 15mins a month,boys will once a week or so at weekend watch a video together in bed. I cant bear background noise and we never have tv/radio/music on unless someone specifically listening/watching, have automatic switch off mindset and do it at my parents too (winds mum up nicely ).
The only TVs in the house that really gets used are the one in the kitchen-kids watch simpsons while eating tea, dh and I watch something while eating our supper (usually something from Tivo), and the one in our room, boys will sometimes ask to watch nature/science programme at bedtime and we watch tv in bed sometimes.
Apparently am in good company as Nigella spends hours in bed watching tele!
oh and naturally all my children are brilliant

[Enid]

15mins a month??

then why have it at all?

[QueenOfQuotes]

"you are mad if you are trying to argue that having the tv on all day actually somehow limits your tv watching."

Like I said we're not all born with fantastic memories and blessed with the time to remember these things.

"so is it on now?"

Yes

is anyone watching it?

Yes

turn it off

NO

[Enid]

and the boys once a week?

god why bother having one in their rooms at all.

sorry, I just don't understnad it

[Enid]

So you leave the tv on all day just because you can't remember to watch Brainteasers.

couldn't you just write yourself a note? Or fork out for Sky +?