yr old dd is masturbating - how to handle

[MrsSawdust]

She's too young for me to explain that this is something she does in private and only by herself. I have two questions:

1. My dh is upset to see her doing it. I want to tell him to get a grip because her behaviour is perfectly normal but how do I do this tactfully? How do your dp's react to this behaviour in your dd's?

1. She often falls asleep lying on me (we co-sleep) and - for want of a better term - has occasionally tried to 'dry hump' me! This is surely inappropriate, but how do I stop her doing that without sending her the message that sexual feelings are wrong or shameful iyswim?

Thanks.

Sorry the thread title should say 1yr old

Sorry how old is she? It hasn't come out in your title

Ah right sorry cross post. No advice from me I'm afraid just wanted to clarify. Hope you get some good advice.

My first thought is that this is entirely normal exploration. But your description of "dry humping" makes me wonder if she has something like thrush which she needs to itch. It might be worth a visit to GP to make sure there is nothing aggravating her and if not I'd leave her to it for fear of giving her any sort of complex.

completely normal, my ds does it all the time. normal exploration. tell dh to relax

What Niggle said. Go to Gp to rule out infections.

my dd used to do similar she would sit on feet, or on her trike and rock/grind not sure how else to describe. she did this when tired, she has grown out of it she is 4 now and she hasnt done it for ages. it is a phase that seemed to pass for my dd, so perhaps will with yours too

17 month old DD does this occasionally too, in particular when we take her nappy off, we thought she had a urinary infection and took her to the doctors only to be told she was masturbating , dont think il ever forget the look on DPs face. Me and Dp have spoken about it, but have just left her to it, until she is old enough to understand.

She doesnt dry hump us though. Sorry, but I did have a little chuckle reading that, it must be very disconcerting . Maybe remove her when she is doing it? or ask the Health visitor?

oh hit wrong button sorry should read dd is 3 now, not 4

Having a fiddle when her nappy is off is completly normal.

The dry humping rings a bell as when DD was tiny (under 18 months but can't remember how old exactly) she had chicken pox. She had it really bad, including between her legs and it was obviousy itchy. When we co-slept she dry humped. Maybe she is itchy down below.

I would agree with the posters suggesting possible itchiness (your poor wee dd!).

The fiddling though? Totally and utterly normal!

My dd's (16 months) hands go straight down there when we take her nappy off! The other day when she was sitting in the bath in about an inch of water she was repeatedly gently slapping the metal plug against her minny and then laughing!

When she gets older I will explain that it's perfectly natural and healthy but that's it's something private and not something you do in company etc.

Your DH needs to realise this or your may grow to have 'dirty' or 'wrong' associations about her body.

Totally normal.

I have 2 DD's both love a good fiddle/explore. They pick up on social cues that it is socially inappropriate when they are 3/4 and then they stop doing it openly.

Glad we live in a more enlightened age, I am sure most of us were told off for it when we were little.