No more naps=stressed out mum!!!

[LFG]

I have recently stopped my 3 yr old from having a mid morning nap and am in need of some de stressing tips.
I have two girls 3 and 21 months. The 21 month girl still has a nap, but my 3 year old was getting out of bed at night several times, so I decided to cut out the daytime nap.
It hasn' seemed to have worked, as some nights she is still refusing to go to bed or is getting up during the night quite a few times or is falling asleep on the sofa during the day.
I am exhausted as she can be very badly behaved when tired and getting up during the night doesn't help either.
Am a single mum, feeling in need of Nanny 911!! Does anyone have any tips or advice??

I feel for you, we've had a lot of problems with 3 year old dd and sleep...

Things that have helped:

Deciding on a routine and pushing it every day.

You could try offering an option of a nap before midday...but if she does not take it try to keep her awake until you want her to sleep.

Having exactly the same routine of calming activities before bedtime each night, eg bath, milk, bedtime story.

Initially setting bedtime to a point at which dd naturally fell asleep very quickly and then gradually bringing it earlier. The idea was that she learnt to associate the calming activities with going to sleep quickly.

Being quite mean about keeping DD awake when she is supposed to be ?e.g not letting her lie down and tickling her.

Once it is bedtime, I just keep telling her to go to bed?.. I try to bore her into submission.

Could you get anyone to help if you want to try this? .e.g with keeping dd awake when she is supposed to be.

With a routine she might wake less at night?or she might just be wanting your company ..or it might be a phase.

Things that didn't help:
Letting dd watch cartoons at 2am.

Letting dd nap randomly and late in the day - the problem was that I was so tired that I just let her do it...but this stopped me establishing a routine.

Good luck.

I am that your dc had naps for as long as she did!
To make you feel better I can tell you that ds1 stopped having daytime naps at 12mths, ds2 stopped at 25 mths and ds3 stopped at 19mths and just has the odd nap every so often if we're in the car and he's particularly worn out!

If not having a nap means your dd sometimes falls asleep on the sofa then although it sounds mean, the key is to keep her awake so she doesn't nap but then maybe bring her bedtime forward so she doesn't have to last as long. It might mean she wakes up a bit earlier in the morning but it will also mean she doesn't have too long to wait for bed at night and hopefully will establish full nights of sleep.
I found that when dcs stopped napping I had to bring forward teatime and bedtime or they would be falling asleep in their tea.
I agree with the advice to pretty much bore your dd into knowing it's bedtime and by not entering into any dialogue but putting her right back into bed each time, it will eventually click but if you're on your own it will be hard work and I hope that a better routine for her will fall into place before too long. Sorry can't help more than that.

and I also agree with boardgames that there needs to be a cut off at noon at the latest if she does have a nap as anytime after that will probably affect the night's bedtime

Thanks to you both. I do all ready have a bedtime routine and try to stick to it as ridgedly as I can, but she can be so defiant!!
I give them both milk and read a story, every other night is bath night.
I don't talk to her when she gets up, but she is keeping my youngest awake.
I know that peseverance is the key and am heartened to know its not just me it happens to.
Thanks again guys xx

For our 3 year old used to do at least 2 before that with the result that he was awake at bedtime for a long time and then grumpy in the mornings...

We reduced his nap to 1 hour max and set a limit of no sleep after 3 in the afternoon. If I can*t geht him to sleep, he will have about one hour quiet time in his room, meaning he is allowed to play in his room or look at his books for that time, as long as he does not come out or starts making too much noise...

Works well for us, bedtime is much better now and he is much happier as well.

What are you doing with my dd2?

Mine was awake untill 10:30pm last night. Got into my bed (loudly) at 2am. Wriggled for at least 40 minutes. Then decided at 5:30am it was breakfast time.

She stopped napping of her own accord when she was about 10 months old.

I am begining to come to the realisation, taht she might just not need much sleep. She never seems tired. I otoh love my bed

.
..

Both of my dc were pretty good sleepers but they did both hit a rough patch as soon as they turned 3. I don't know if it was to do with no longer napping in the day or not - actually, it probably wasn't in the case of my ds because he stopped napping in the day as soon as he was 2 eek! - but, anyway, by 3 we had some terrible stand-offs about going to bed and getting up in the night, with both of them.

What I did was be very firm about bedtime, going to bed, staying in bed etc. I would sit outside the bedroom door and calmly take them back to bed each time they got up. Sometimes this took a couple of hours or more!

But, with my ds in particular, when he got up and came into my room in the night (usually around 2 or 3 am) I would let him get into bed and sleep with me. It went on for about 6 months and I grew to absolutely love it.

In the end he started staying in his own bed more and more and it stopped altogether by the time he was 4.

I look back on those nights sleeping with him with great fondness and wish he would come in for a cuddle every now and then - but he only does it now if he's ill .

Ah that's so sweet BBH!

DD comes into our bed and kicks like a mule.