Warring toddlers

[ttalloo]

DS1 (three next month) has always been jealous of DS2 (15 months), but since DS2 started walking two months ago it's got a lot worse, with DS1 screaming or hitting every time DS2 touches anything (whether it's his or not), or comes near me. DS2 has quickly wised up to the fact that it's better to attack than wait to be attacked, so he goes in for pre-emptive strikes even when his brother is leaving him alone, so DS1 gets bitten, scratched and hit a lot. I keep telling myself this is just a phase they're going through, and they'll eventually learn to get on, but I was wondering if there is anything I can do to help them get there a bit faster. At the moment I feel like a UN peacekeeper and not a particularly effective one at that!

I would try and get their little minds focused by working on something together like a painiting, working in the garden (if you have one), baking cakes etc. If you can get them to work together it should be easier to get them to play together.
Have you tried a behaviour chart for DS1? For every good thing he does he gets a star, and at the end of the week he get a toy or something.
If DS1 asks why DS2 doesnt have 1, you could say they're only for big boys, or something to that effect.
Good luck..hope i have been some help.

I agree with what Mummysgoingmad said about them doing stuff together but in terms of stopping the scraps, I think you need to concentrate on the younger one. If he ends up in lumber for smacking etc, he?ll soon stop and hopefully, the older one will have weighed up the whole job lot at the same time!

Thanks for the tips on getting them to work together on doing something nice, and on concentrating on DS2's behaviour - I'll definitely give it a go.

My two 18months and 3 are EXACTLY the same as this. It's awful, and nothing helps - sitting with them, playing - it always ends in tears!

I'm kind of thinking/hoping perhaps when the little one starts talking things will get better.........