Is my 23 month old DD Lazy?

[marmalade32]

My 23 month old DD will not walk - she can walk and walks very well, runs about like a loony when she does decide to. It's just that she would rather be carried--everywhere...including around the house. I don't do it in the house but if we're out she just won't walk - sits down and cries and screams and refuses to move. Do I leave her ? and retreat to a place where I can see her and wait for her to come ? It's getting ridiculous now..she's getting too heavy to cart around everywhere. I dread going out with her on my own. I'm sure she can't be lazy as she loves playing out at nursery and soft play and wacky warehouses etc, but I can;t think what to do...please help...Apologies if I don't answer straight away - as you might guess I am on night shift so will not see the answers til Tuesday.

I am 8 hours ahead of you so I am also enjoying MN time at work .

I would not say that lazy is the right term but it is a learned behaviour. A learned behaviour that you will have to crack I think. From her perspective, it is probably nicer to be carried, it is faster, closer to the action, gets her lots of lovely attention and anyway, who wants to look at a bunch of knees all day.

Do you think you might be walking a bit too fast for her outside or could the traffic or busy shopping malls be making her anxious?

I think you may have to grit your teeth and let her get mad until she learns that you are not for backing down. I can't imagine that it will take too long before she gets the message but it will probably feel like it!

I know what you mean - Lazy wasn't a very nice word to use..but you're probably right - it is nice to have a cuddle and still be out and about. Not sure how I'll do this - I think the floors of shops will become very familiar to me as I sit down next to her and wait !!! I had a feeling that's what would be said but was secretly hoping for a quick fix cure ! Thank you, though

Push chair? She's still very little and there's a difference between walking to get somewhere and walking/running about because you want to. I would give her the choice of walk or push chair rather than walk or carry. But make sure she gets tons and tons of cuddles to make up for the once you'll both miss out on if you're not carrying her any more!

She hates the pushchair, which is the problem really. I think I need to be a bit tougher and stand firm on pushchair or walking and just make sure cuddles are for at home and worth the wait. Thank you

Buggy board? We were fortunate to have chosen the Pliko Pramette with a "built-in" buggy board and never knew how useful it would be. My nearly 2yo DS hates sitting in the pushchair and also likes to be carried but will stand for quite a distance on the buggy board. I give him the choice of walking or standing on the step and he usually chooses one or the other.

Now that sounds like a plan...never thought of a buggy board. Thank you Babyisaac. Will go online now and buy one.

we've just been battling with this with DS. He sussed out that Daddy will happily carry him everywhere, so overnight Daddy became favourite

Anyway, he decided that he was either walking, or being carried and refused point blank to get in the pushchair (he's 25mo btw). Eventually just gave him the pushchair or walk choice (I can't carry him more than a few feet), and he's still acting up a bit, and I've got damned good at folding him into the buggy and ignoring the wails but we're getting there

DS1 did not like walking outside all that much - he got very tired and was also a really really slow.

A little dolls buggy did the trick for us. He used to push his Thomas the Tank Engine around in it.

Inside, I'd say, you need to stop picking her up, and let her have a tantrum about it (outside too, for that matter). It will never stop if you continue to give in

Sorry, just saw that you don't do it inside the house ...

my ds did not really like the pushchair until i made him a TTTE blacket taggs on it. its about a metre square so i can pop it over the handles and hang it beside him. if he is feeling anxious he cuddles up under it and peaks out at the world. he does seem to be a little bit nervous of new places and this works quite well as does a favourite snack if we go somewhere very busy.

A agree with Jamie about giving her something to push.

Ds1 used to walk much further pushing his little pink dolly buggy with a teddy in it.

He's a bit older now and adores this scooter.

It's fairly pricey but worth every penny as he goes for miles on it. He got it when he was 2 1/2 and got the hang of it pretty quickly.

A few of my friends' kids have them now and they all seem to love them - the huge advantage beiing that they move at a decent speed, not snails pace

I second a mini micro scooter.

Dd had hers for her 2nd birthday and loved it. Definitely worth the money and very sturdy.

Unless you are reeeally tall, they can stand on it and be pulled along by you holding the handle bars too.

A friend has a really neat tag along bike that attaches to the pushchair. ?Great little traders or blooming marvelous. Her son loves it.

The other thing worth looking at is a trike with push handle and harness.

I've got 1 of those trikes but I never think of using it inside a shopping centre. That's worthing looking at too.The mini scooter is a good idea as she's a bit of a tomboy - loves pretty dresses but throws worms at people and the like....I'll have a look at that as she is 2 in Feb so would be a perfect introduction to being a big girl and not breaking mummy's back.

I do slightly have kittens when I see 2 year olds careering off on the MiniMicro scooters.

Have to be sure you can catch them before they reach the road (of course some 2 year olds are good about stopping at roads - one of mine was, the other - no)

Yes, very true Jamie. My DD is quite good with danger though, she is a bit on the cautious side. Maybe why she doesn't like walking as Stanley says - bit nervous. So I would be happy to let her try, under very strict supervision, and mummy shouting like a banshee I would imagine.